Sitting in bed w coffee and boys and contemplating my stupidity along w other things . Of course .

Hard last 3 weeks . I have known Rita for 100 yrs . She used to be an aide and a secretary at general surgery units , and I go there often when post op trouble shooting / nurses call me . Rita moved to staffing position ( improvement on pay scale and an office job ), few years ago . Yay , go Rita go !

I wasn’t friends w Rita , basically bcz my antisocial ass is friends w nobody really , yet , I am everybody’s friend some how .
People come to me , and often I go out looking for them , they might not know a thing about me other than that single / dogs / , but I know much about them .♥️
If I know that anyone is on any type of trouble , I have my ways to make it better . I work quietly and efficiently on that , and truth is , I get away w murder , the accent , the reputation , I get no refusals on my requests .♥️
People have troubles all the time . People want more time off to be w family . People struggle w studies . Or sick . Or deaths in family . Heart broken love stories . Divorces . Money short . Struggling w teens or toddlers . Struggling w work stress . Petty arguments . Name it . I hear it all . Where do I find the x , the fuck I know , but I do . As I am rounding through out units or at ED , I make the time . Then I go home or drive the long ass drive back and tunnel and bridges , and if it’s something I can do or have others do to help , it happens . Magic . It makes me happy . I knew that Rita comes from the ghetto . Had a son that died from drugs 6 yrs ago . I knew that she lives w someone for 20 yrs . And has a daughter local too . Rita progressed to pay roll duties , and last two year she became the coordinator of office / payroll time keeping / and other duties that staffing does . Yay ! Again , go Rita go !
Last September , her partner died . I understood that was little older than her . Rita mid 50s . I was upset .
I never got a vibe that Rita was living a love life w him , but she was living , and things were working , and I am a practical person who thinks bills while others send prayers and similar shit . A month after death and such, I contacted Rita and asked her how she gonna pay rent w one income now , and also gave her some money for expenses . She did not asked . I shoved to her hands and I used my golden line that I use to make people feel less charity : “ listen . I am older , single , no f kids , I work all the time, wtf u want me to do w my money , take and take care of business .”.

By January, I got to see Rita at ED , she came to remind me that I need to renew some of my certificates and other bullshit in my file , all work relating crap that Rita keeps up to date for us . I asked what is she gonna do w housing and how it goes . Said she is moving actually in 2 weeks to a new aprtn . I got excited . Yay ! Not living at same place w dead memories . Again , go Rita go . I asked her to let me be a part of this ! First of all , who is moving your crap , don’t pay anyone , let me call few I know w trucks and arms that they owe me 100 favors . ! Second. She said she was short 500 bucks on deposit . And she was gonna pick up extra shifts on floors as secretary to come up with . Nonsense . Here is 1000, I wrote her a check , go pack and get ready . Haven’t heard from Rita for next 3 weeks . Then I got that damn kidney stone . Mid February I asked her via email for new address of hers so I can update my Amazon , and where to send her house warming gifts and valentines gifts . ( I always try to send shit to people who I know are lonely and alone at V day . Btw , if any of u use all these shit I am typing here against me , tell me what a nice person I am and crap , we r done ! I am not nice . I just have time and few extra bucks some x . So don’t even .)
Rita send me a new address . I send goodies . In March I went down to staffing office for some bullshit , can’t even remember . The staffer who I also know for 500 yrs was upset . Told me that Rita is working two jobs at other hospitals , that she wasn’t able to get the aprtn bcz bad credit , that her car broke down and not fixable , and that they picking her up daily to bring her to work . And that She moved in an extended stay hotel for 400 a week . I was furious . When the fuck any of u we’re gonna tell me ? I can help ! Wtf ! The week after , the head department manager and the staffers got an email out w bank account info to donate whatever everyone could for Rita . We figured a car first , then will move her out of hotel shit . We all made deposits . That brought us to early April . When I realized on emails , that Rita’s last name no longer the same . So I took another trip to office . Wtf . And met w upset people there , and the head manager who told me that apparently she got married . Ok . Surprised , but ok , I don’t care . R we getting a car ? R we getting a place to live ? That’s when they show me fb and Instagram pix of new husband . Gangster wanna be image , openly talking trash , and u know we checked out . Criminal record from here to Italy long on paper scroll if to print . No job ( no shit ), smoking crack all day long apparently . Living w Rita at hotel . No car either . Let me tell u , I lost my shit . But ok . What u gonna do . Choices . Ok . If that’s what Rita wanted , congrats , we still got her a hefty amount of money to change things , she got that money , but we can’t force nobody . Point is , nobody will drive her ass again , and did not even got to that , she never showed up to work after they called her out . It has been near 3 weeks . Specialists and contractors , r schedules are not done . Emails never answered . Payroll headaches . She just does not come to work . Yet poses on fb smoking crack w him , etc etc . Nothing good . Heart breaking . HR will follow the hoops so she can be fired appropriately for no call no show / absence policy . And I am sitting here heart broken . I can’t comprehend . Y ? Worked so hard all her life , w a highschool diploma to make it to 30 bucks an hr , an office , and people who supporting her . What’s next for her and that half ass pimp of hers ? Jail ? How long b4 homeless ? Who is paying bills , neither works ? How she let us all down like this ? Was intentional or is she lost her f mind ? How long b4 she contacts me for money ? Well , that question answered today . I got a text , saying she misses me and how I am doing . Do I answer ? Or play deaf ? And I am thinking . How many info she has from all of us as payroll ? Home address , ssn , bank account ? In all years I have known Rita , she and I never exchanged phone numbers . No need . I always email her work account . She had to go and look for my number today , that’s for sure . So I had a f anxiety attack . What else her and the pimp are looking about me ? I contacted the hospital . Y is she still has access on our info . Yes , she still has her working lap top , that was never turned in . So I am sitting here thinking , fuck , should I worry living alone and all ? Where is the line btwen stupidity and kindness . Were we fools to help Rita , and r we on the hook for unpleasant surprises ? I worry . Rest of coworkers who know what’s going on r worry too . M I over dramatic here ? ( u ain’t gonna hurt my feelings , I know what I drama Queen I am . )

This is a pic of Mr ET having his sweet taste* on a French fancy place in DC 2 months or so ago . Bcz mr ET goes where ever I go , and bcz no fucks given by me of what humans think of us in public . He is a friend for 27 yrs in this crazy country, two aliens together is better than one . And the more I interact w humans , the more I feel like I fit nowhere . Go mr ET go! ♥️