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ATTRACTION DISTRACTION
What attributes in others are you drawn to even when the rest of their qualities should have you running for the hills? Bad boys/girls? Musician? Money? Accents? Artists? Cooking skills? Physique? What bad choices have you made?

kmdskit3 8 Dec 20
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In the spirit of full disclosure I should admit what qualities in a woman make me turn off my ability to think clearly. Any woman who works out seriously, ESPECIALLY if she's muscular, I can become emotionally clueless around. Been in more than one relationship with a muscular woman that went on too long. When I'm thinking clearer I only find women attractive if I like them. Don't care what they look like- if I don't like them they're not attractive to me.

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I am almost invariably attracted to the interesting, which usually means the problematic. Borderline and Bipolar (and I visited her in the psych ward BEFORE we dated) ? Dated for a year, despite her promises of suicide and throwing items at me. Unemployed stoner? 9 months of learning what made her rely on my support. Multiple women who suppressed emotions? Sign me up to figure out that I could get through to their emotions just a bit before they dumped me.
I always want to know more, and I always find that it doesn't help.

Dude! Be careful. Sounds like a lot of drama. Must admit though I've been in more than my share of relationships where I thought I could 'fix' her.

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It's a tough one. I tend to value a certain type of personality. Typically when reading someone's comments or introductory bio, you can get a peek into someone's character. I would ignore all" bad choices" in the profile if I like the self description. If I see wit, a healthy sense of humor, I just might start a conversation.

So what would be the "bad choices" you might ignore?

@kmdskit3 mmm... Smokers are no go, any kinds of addiction, no direction in life, if someone makes an impression of being too tense or too shallow. No on aspiring creative types, with rare exceptions. Everything depends on goals really.

I guess I try to stay away from someone who's not very self-reflective, has an overly negative self-image, doesn't have a sense of humor, doesn't value education, right-wing politically, misogynists, homophobes, racists etc. That last one I've been encountering more and more lately; probably because of the current political climate and because I am a big bald white guy so people assume... 😟 I look for women with emotional intelligence, a good laugh and it would be nice if they liked cats! 😉

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