My ex and I share the kids week on week off. It was a long and expensive legal battle, but fortunately things were resolved somewhat satisfactorily. I'm a bit annoyed at how the B.C. courts set up support payments though, as they don't take into account cost of living. So if you live in an expensive area, with most of your income going toward food/housing/utilities, you could still be obligated to give a substantial amount to your ex that actually exceeds your remaining net income. So at one point I was putting all of one of my semi-monthly paychecks towards housing/utilities, and the other was going to food/bills, yet I was expected to magically produce another $1000+ a month because of the difference in our incomes. Fortunately I managed to move to a more affordable place, that made support payments possible.

I just left about a month ago and live 5 minutes from my 2 sons. It's like I live out of town though because I don't infringe on whatever they have planned and so far the co-parenting thing is working out fine. I don't even set foot in their house and this is the standard that's been set on my end. Just be there for the kid and do it with all you got each and everytime that you have the chance. It will be remembered and appreciated someday.

I got lucky when my ex and I split. She moved 75 miles away to be with her boyfriend, and I stayed at the house with our 3 kids. It's a lot of work raising them myself, but I'd be completely miserable if it was the reverse and I only got to see them every other weekend. I definitely feel for you! But you're right, the system is set up to favor the kids being with the mother. I constantly have to clarify on custody and child support documents that I am the custodial parent, not her. It's like they can't even fathom the idea.