Another great thread here. I just finished a Netflix series from Australia that I thoroughly enjoyed watching. It has a trans character as well as numerous variations on sexual identity that was generally handled in a forthright way. It’s called Secret City. Sexual behavior and identity just shouldn’t matter and I believe the series does justice to the reality even if it only scratches the surface. This thread is brilliant but I am not feeling very much like really digging in more, but great job to all. We all juggle and have to often carefully navigate our lives. By what I have read, kudos to all. Great responses and stories. I so respect each of you.

Personally, I am put at work. My bigger fear is having to possibly go back in the closet in retirement some day. Everyones situation is different.

I have been out now at work the past 5 years, but only to people closest to me, with whom it is customary to talk about weekend plans, etc. Right now that is only 4 people (very small department). We have a couple new doctors coming on-board in the coming months. I fully intend to clue them in, but it needs to come up naturally. It is not something I feel like making an issue of. To my counseling patients, I make a conscious point to come out to those who are identifying as lgbt and have expressed they've been through a lot of judgment and rejection for it. I think it's important they understand that I personally get where they're coming from. I still don't talk any details about my personal relationships, to be sure. Non-lgbt patients I am never out to, but if they directly ask me, I am not going to lie. If they want to find another counselor over that information, perhaps they should.

I noticed the article talked about work culture and social attitudes but said NOTHING about legal dangers faced by employees. A few comments here touched on that point. It is worth pointing out that there is still no federal protection for LGBT people in the workplace, and many states remain at-will states, where employers don't even have to provide a justification for why they fire someone if they don't want to. It is then very hard for that employee to prove that discrimination, even if it happens to be illegal, was the reason for being fired.
I work in Louisiana, one of the worst of the worst in terms of worker rights and Bible-thumping homophobic culture (I tip my hat to our Mississippi neighbors). I most certainly was not out early in my career; same reason the article mentions of young workers feeling particularly vulnerable without experience "cred" yet to argue in their favor.
I now work for a large health care system that has explicit policies protecting lgbt people. We've even had a cultural sensitivity training campaign the past 4 years to alert employees to concerns and needs of trans patients. So I "can" be out at work. But policies and culture don't always mesh perfectly, to say the least.

I work in psychiatry, which is supposed to be particularly enlightened about this stuff, and yes, it IS better than many fields in this respect, but I still hear tidbits of homophobic sentiment pop out here and there, and some of the worst has even come from a high-ranking clinician in psychiatry I used to work with, someone who sets policy and wields a lot of clout with promotions and pay raises. He wasn't mean about it, just clueless and kind of insensitive, and that can still effect one's career opportunities and work environment negatively. I never directly came out to him. Over time I think he might have pieced it together, but even so, he was generally narcissistic enough not to bother remembering personal details of his underlings. He once mentioned to me as advice to avoid talking to patients about my personal life, a piece of advice I saw him routinely violate for himself.

It's a shame people still feel the need to do this. I think a lot of it is about small pockets of negativity towards LGBT, often passed off as humour, the 'humour' innocently joined in with by others, and the whole thing going unchallenged. I don't believe this is typically systemic homophobia and transphobia.

I came out at work several years ago. One person in particular worried me, because he'd made his opinion of "queers" quite clear a few times in the past. And he seemed pretty serious. But none of this has changed the way he treats me at all. We still get on and have a laugh. He just no longer expresses those opinions.

And I'm not sure he still holds them. I'm I strong believer that if you come out to someone you know well, they're likely to change their beliefs about LGBT people based on the person they know you to be, rather than the other way around. Of course it doesn't always work out like that. Some people genuinely react badly to that revelation, and there's always a danger that one of those people will be one of your superiors.

My boss sat me down and said "Firstly, this doesn't affect your job. Secondly, if anyone makes an issue of it, you come straight to me. Thirdly, if you ever decide to transition, please come and talk it through with us so that we can work out how to best integrate it into the workplace."

Probably straight out of an HR textbook, but I really can't fault him or the organisation on the handling, and it's pretty clear from his own positivity that he doesn't have any personal issues with my sexuality or gender identity.

I have been out at all of my jobs since I was 21. At first, in the 90's, it was part of some duty I felt that I had, part of national coming out day. Even with non-discrimination policies, people are still prejudiced. As it evolved into a crusade for equal rights, it became about my life and my marriage, my rights, my pay. Currently, I work for the state of Texas. The department I work for has non-discrimination policy. My boss is a gay man, my director is
a lesbian. We are all out. My office is, at full employment, is 1000+ strong, the department mostly women, very well educated and capable. The biggest surprise has been the firing of women for (almost) openly discriminating against other women. The gay and bisexual women in those departments all quit, as did all of the new mothers.
Discrimination is insidious, just because your office is safe now, it might all change with one bad manager. I think if I had it to do all over, I would remain aloof to my co-workers about my personal life. I would wear a ring whether or not I was married. If I developed friendships with coworkers, it would be off campus. It's difficult when I work with women because I inherently trust them.

I'm not out at work. A couple of women customers are trying to see me outside work and one has asked me if I'm gay. I laughed and said no. Since I'm bi it was technically not a lie but the point remains; it would be dangerous for them to know.

If the article is a picture of your world, I am having a hard time identifying with it. People at work are only acquaintances. I have never socialized much with people I work with. I know others do, but I have difficulty with that. That does not mean I don't interact, but I keep secrets comfortably.

I'm not out at work. I think it's perfectly okay to keep it private in certain situations. In thinking about it, I'm not sure if that's "being in the closet," or just knowing that keeping it private is more prudent with some people. Plus, my bosses don't discuss their private life/sex life with me, so I don't feel the need to discuss mine with them.

My work is very inclusive and diverse. We can all be who we are and be comfortable at the office.

Work was the last place I came out to. It was the only place I presented even remotely as a man, and it kept me from going in the place (I can work from home). Other than work, I'd been presenting as female 24/7 for 8 months.

To cut a long story short, coming out was the best decision of my life, by far. I'm trans, bi, poly, and couldn't care less who knows or what their opinion is about it. I'm happy af, and that's way good enough for me.

Can't see who is or isn't an insufferable pig in today's world when everyone looks the same. Even those that know, I trust only so far. What is said to your face could be a lie.