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Okay !!! Hellooooo .. I am Nick... I sometimes write a little .. Sometimes I read a poem to other humans in rooms with lights and a microphone but not often. Some people on here have asked for links to poems or music I have been making or involved in so here is a poem.. This is me in an automatic writing trance with no forethought and cognitive dysentry. One shot .. haven't a clue where it came from lol 🙂

Normal People

I've seen what "normal" people do,
Lets keep it formal, storm all, breach all
Don't think about the fall, kamikaze
It's the illuminati, dr fucking moriarty
lets party, lets dance but keep it arty
I've seen what normal people do
it's quite shocking, keep on trucking
not a look in, fully booking, highly
recommended, up ended, extended and rendered
I've seen what normal people do,
keep it core temp erratic fantastic
ram spitting broken reflections
constant corrections, equations
persuasions of mathematical delusion
protrusions, confusions, the infinite legion
exhale slowly, don't show me
I won't show you, don't know you
Keep it even don't feel the frequency
of eden
I've seen what normal people do,
steps off serial killer
much iller, the dog's dinner
sunshine directly from the interior
posterior injunctions for function
I've seen what normal people do,
the hall of mirrors, give me shivers
you could cry rivers waiting
for the universe to deliver
the sun explodes the human rash
it spreads long, the stars it watches
just more planetary notches
When starbucks own the moon
it won't be long it might be soon
In space can't hear accountants scream's
I've seen what normal people do,
don't be mean, keep it lean
eat your spleen, with ice cream
have a sherry then sink a ferry
or fall in love with something legendary
eat your greens, doesn't matter where they come from
eat your hat, then you will be someone
eat your head if you can find one
it won't be long.
I've seen what normal people do,
they say there is no hope there is nothing
no stuffing, fluffed up like puffins
roughing up nothing and no one or something
shooting elephants lions and rare creatures
no features, heated toilet seats
busy feet, exercising in buildings
woods never ended, sun rain and descended
treadmills to nowhere, something somewhere
somebody isn't there, in an empty park
it's always light but it's dark
beware open spaces, odd faces, traces
evidence of any kind, don't waste it
eat it up spit it out let's face it
let's not face it
I've seen what normal people do,
they don't like rain, think its a pain
too much sun isn't good
build houses where it floods
take unidentified drugs, refuse hugs
stand in cues silently planning to
get home and swat small bugs
that have done no thing other than
breathe and get confused before
being smashed into goo
i've seen what normal people do.

Nickbeee 8 Mar 31
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3 comments

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1

I like this very much. Very creative, fun and I like how it flows

Livinlife Level 9 Apr 1, 2018
1

Fun to read. I like your rhymes. Watches and notches my favorite. I’m no expert but I enjoyed this. Thank you for sharing!

PrettyCool Level 4 Mar 31, 2018
1

@Nickbee -- Well, sir, I've read better free prose in public restrooms. I will give you this much; you had some good bits of wordplay in there. Now, before you get all uptight and out of sorts, understand that I am an editor as well as an author. I talk to all of my writers in the same way, so you have not been singled out. I will not say something is good when it's not. So, if this interminably long rambling bit of meaningless scribbling can be called anything, poem is not it. In a pub or a club, read rapidly with considerable fervor, maybe. Written acid trips just don't make it -- unless they are reasonably well disciplined. Try us again with something that has some meaning behind it with prose that flows and reads well.

Dude you are tripping ... people love my work.. Music - writing all of it.. I won't name drop because you would get well "out of joint" bud lmao 😉

@Nickbeee -- Dude, no tripping here. Send this piece to a genuine publisher and see where it goes. So, I ask you point blank, aside from those who "love your work", what is your publishing history? One of the things I always point out to aspiring writers is, never have family, friends, and others close to you do your beta reading. Perhaps those you hang with do love your work, but I wouldn't publish this particular piece.

Because of the word play I saw in it, I know you have potential. Show me something else.

@evidentialist Mate I do it for fun ... My history is just in performing as a hobby and I want nothing to do with your commercial crap lol ... I have performed with for one John Sinclair .. (Kick our the Jams Mother fuckers) - -with people who have performed with Sun Ra Arkestra the Jazz masters. . I could honestly just go on and and on and on .. leave it ... shut up - crawl back into your ego dude lol.

@evidentialist I truly respect you have worked hard and done a lot .. but you have no right to assume anything you have or ever speak to anyone that way.. You are disrespectful and brash.

@Nickbeee -- Neither is true. Open and honest to wannabe writers, those who are working in the field, and those who do it for fun. Anyone who endeavors to write creatively owes it to themselves to be open to criticism in an effort to improve their craft. As for speaking the way I do, I have every right, just as you have every right to disagree or ignore -- your choice.

I am not a wannabe writer - you are constantly devaluing .. health reasons are the main reason it hasn't been furthered @evidentialist - do you imagine you can give me a brain transplant as that is pretty much what it would take! ? You have no right... I repeat .. you speak in ignorance !!

@Nickbeee -- And you don't dispel my ignorance so that we can communicate. If you want to be understood you need to provide information. And let's stop using the dramatic "...have no right..." line. I have every right.

@evidentialist i have no need to justify anything to you. You have already shown your level. I have looked at your writing and its vapid and hollow imo. I am a proven artist. The above piece is firstly lyrical not a poem as you assumed. It follows complex musical timing you don't understand so you missinterpret it completed. What can i honestly learn from you? I honestly have no interest .. you need to firstly look into neurodiversity. You approach is not inclusive and displays a fair chunk of ignorant as i have said, not only to people but art and where music lyricsm & poetry marry or interlink. I have no need to justify or explain anything to you. From feedback i already have i know my writing is highly developed and not only that, due to set or specific neurological condition. You are very needy. You need to let this conversation go before you further emabarass yourself. You have judged me on one piece of music you thought was a poem alone. It's kinda both and not only uses complex timing changes you don't get is loved and has many supportive comments where it is posted. Comments from leading musician in the uk music industry. You are a dinosaur who has missjudged this situation based on a set of values and predujices born from dead values. You have nothing to offer to me. This much is clear. Good luck ?

@Nickbeee -- I didn't think of it as a poem alone and I didn't ask you for justification. I asked you for information. My dad was a successful songwriter in Hollywood. He and I worked together. I worked in and around the music business for years. I worked as a performer, musician, and singer. I understand a little something about music and meter and lyrical value.

I did not attack you personally. You chose to take it that way. What I got in response was ad hominem and whining -- and you persist. Why?

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