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Trump Pinata
May 30, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
It is sad to see the name John McCain on the same page as that of Donald Trump, the late Senator McCain suffered for and served his country in such a way that pales anything that Trump has ever or will ever do into insignificance. The hero has my ...
6 comments
The Escapees- - Hide here!
May 30, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Anybody in here know what DNA stands for?
9 comments
50s +
May 30, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Two old ladies meet in the street, I'm so sorry to hear of your husbands death! Whatever happened? Well, I was preparing Sunday lunch and he went down to the vegetable patch to cut a cabbage, he had a massive heart attack and dropped dead. How ...
2 comments
Just for Laughs
May 30, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
2 gay men in a bar,1 goes to the counter, 2 gins please, barman says which would you like we have 3 sorts, Oxygin, Nitrogin and hydrogin! Hang on I'll ask my friend, after hearing this the other guy goes to the bar, 2 turds please, sorry? says the ...
3 comments
Trump Pinata
May 30, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Try the Trump diet! Every time you go to eat something, think of the fat bastards face, that will put you off food alright!
7 comments
General & Hellos
May 30, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Should a nation where the majority live in houses constructed like garden sheds ignore the cause of freak and severe weather phenomenon?
1 comment
Trump Pinata
May 29, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A boy walking along a road, he finds a big blue rosette the a "T" on it, pins it on his chest, then a baseball cap with Trump on it which he puts on, then a placard Trump 2020 which he carries. A car slows down to keep pace with him and a mans voice ...
1 comment
Politics
May 29, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Can't just keep ignoring global warming, or can you?
4 comments
Just for Laughs
May 29, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Exercise is always a good thing but my wife has started to do the splits 50 times each morning, personally I think that's stretching it a bit!
7 comments
50s +
May 28, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Arab peoples believe 40 years to be the "Age of wisdom" this, some may think, a little severe. I think the Arabs may have been 10 years off the mark. Having said that, there is no fool like an old fool in our philosophy! Oh dear! Posting ...
8 comments
The Escapees- - Hide here!
May 28, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Treesexual. Tarzan meets Jane, do you have a girlfriend? No! What do you do for sex? I know a tree with a waist height hole lined with soft moss! Jane lies on her back and opens her legs, would you like to try this? Tarzan kicks her hard in the ...
2 comments
Just for Laughs
May 28, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Whats the difference between expedition and explosion? with expedition it's "There you are!" with explosion it's "Where are you?"
2 comments
FreeThinkers
May 27, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
I have some strong thoughts about this but, define psychic for me!
1 comment
50s +
May 27, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
50s + Joke. A Jack Russel and an Alsatian at the vets, Alsatian asks, why you here man? I went ape shit, can't say why, I trashed my owners pad, ripped all the curtain and pulled the stuffing out of the furniture! She's having me put down. God, I was...
3 comments
Just for Laughs
May 27, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Police pull a driver over for driving erratically, the cop asks the man, have you been drinking sir, not a drop the man replies, I think you have sir, no definitely not! His wife leans over and says there's no point arguing with him when he's drunk ...
6 comments
The Escapees- - Hide here!
May 27, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
The only thing that is better than being bisexual for improving you chances of scoring is being in prison!
4 comments
Trump Pinata
May 27, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Old Iranian saying; What shall it profit a man if he owns half the hotels in the world yet looks like a camel shit on his head?
3 comments
50s +
May 27, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
After analysis of this group I have found that most over 50s are far better at commentating than posting! :P
10 comments
Just for Laughs
May 26, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Jesus was wandering in the wilderness during a sandstorm, Knocks heads with an old man who is covered in rags too, what are you doing in this storm? asks the old man, I'm looking for my father, thats strange, I'm looking for my son! How will you know...
7 comments
50s +
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Sometimes I am taken aback by my own reflection in a shop window or other reflective surface, whilst expecting it to be me as I remember me, I think, who is that old git? Thats a downside of getting old, we don't inside, just outside! DOH!
8 comments
Just for Laughs
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
One ear of corn to another, "Don't let the bastards grind you down man"
6 comments
Music Fans
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A great song from my youth was (I think) Manfred Mann, the lead singer, Paul Jones had a great voice, I think it was called I've been a bad bad boy, or that was part of the lyric? Help.
1 comment
Just for Laughs
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Bar door opens and a man with a large basket shouts, seafood, shrimps mussels, a customer shouts "Got any crabs on ya cock"?
1 comment
The Escapees- - Hide here!
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A guy is walking into a bar and treads in a dog-shit on the step, dirty bastards he says scraping his shoe, after, he's having a beer at the bar when a really big guy steps in the dog-shit too, I just did that he said.....severely beaten, poor man!
0 comments
FreeThinkers
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Thinking outside the box! If Americans want to bring about political change a good start would be to stop using the peoples pacifier (television) and get out and protest. Change wont come while you are watching ass holes being blown away on the box ...
2 comments
The Escapees- - Hide here!
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
I've been in here for 15 minutes and nobody's talking to me already!
8 comments
Just for Laughs
May 25, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Would a conductor use his baton to start a movement.......or prune juice like us?
5 comments
Humour, Fun, Chuckles, Laughs, or Cutes, From Everywhere.
May 24, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A couple having sex, after 25 minutes the guy says, Ain't you ever going to come honey? Sorry! she says, I just can't think of anybody......
3 comments
Trump Pinata
May 24, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
What connects "The burning bush" "Thrush" "The Pox" and "Donald Trump"? They all describe irritating "CTS"
3 comments
Just for Laughs
May 24, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Two old ladies and a young girl standing at a bus-stop, the young lady lights a cigarette and it starts to spit with rain, damn she says and reaches into her bag, takes out a condom and nail scissors cuts the condom, covers her cigarette and smokes ...
8 comments
Trump Pinata
May 24, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
This is a bit deep! If a tree fell in the rain forest and landed on Donald Trump, would anybody give a shit if it made a noise or not?
8 comments
Just for Laughs
May 24, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
The "burning bush" cheapest Irish Whiskey you can buy?
1 comment
Just for Laughs
May 24, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
God; Moses I have something for you! Oh yes, whats that? Commandments! How much do they cost? They're free! I'll take 10!
5 comments
50s +
May 23, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Of course, some things never change, I'm cooking a chilli and just opened a tin of "Italian peeled Torino tomatoes.......What part of peeled don't the idiots get? Could say half peeled or half heartedly peeled but no. DIY as usual!
1 comment
50s +
May 23, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
One of the things that really annoys me is change! You learn all this computer stuff and they change it so you don't know what your're doing again, New Skype sucks and if they "improve" it again I wont use it. There!
8 comments
Just for Laughs
May 23, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Do you think there is a fine line between sitting on a pier and actually fishing?
19 comments
Music Fans
May 22, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Any of you heard of the Specials, a British band from the city of Coventry, Ghost town is a great song and social comment! Oh! It's old fashioned too!
1 comment
Music Fans
May 22, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Always the sun by the Stranglers, I love it, you find it and enjoy it please!
0 comments
Just for Laughs
May 22, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A man arguing with his wife, look here he says, I'm the boss in this house and don't you forget it, any more of your blah, blah and you will be doing this ironing yourself!
7 comments
How to stay safe online
May 22, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
When I get a pop-up from my so-called free anti-virus saying my computer is under threat or vulnerable, are they trawling for money?
1 comment
Trump Pinata
May 22, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Abe Lincolns famous "you can fool some..etc." quote should have included the line, but you can be a fool and get to run these here United States of America!
2 comments
Trump Pinata
May 22, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Americans are apple pie sure enough but how is it the President is such a tart?
3 comments
Just for Laughs
May 22, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Crossword Clue: Overworked postman, how many letters? "Feckin thousands"
3 comments
Music Fans
May 21, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Do you remember a song called "It's because of me" a song about lust and temptation, must have been in the 70s but can't remember the artist's name, sorry.
2 comments
Trump Pinata
May 21, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
I was in a supermarket shopping and saw a loaf of bread, made me think of Donald Trump but when I looked again it said "THICK CUT"
3 comments
50s +
May 21, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Trump visits an old peoples home, goes to the bedside of a very old lady and holds her hand for the cameras, the lady looks blankly at him, do you know who I am says Trump, no she replies, but if you ask matron she will tell you!
4 comments
Trump Pinata
May 21, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Given the chequered history of tolerance in President's, I wonder how much the Secret Service pay Trumps personal body guards?
4 comments
FreeThinkers
May 21, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
In other species there are thieves, murderers and those who display what we would describe as loose morals, are we alone in feeling guilt?
5 comments
Just for Laughs
May 21, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A lady's parting euphemism, "remember the good times" = remember when you had loads of money!
7 comments
Just for Laughs
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Three novice nuns stand in a queue before the Mother Superior, she calls the first forward and asks her have you ever had sexual contact with a man? The poor girl trembles and says, I once touched a mans penis Mother superior....very well, wash your ...
4 comments
Trump Pinata
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
I have posted one or two ditties on this group and some of you may have noticed from my spelling that I am not from your shores! I am in fact what North Americans call an Englander! I am, in fact, a mongrel just like the rest of the population of the...
5 comments
Trump Pinata
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
It's no good looking for intelligent life in the universe, too big a job, start small, try looking in the White house, rah!!
9 comments
Music Fans
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Labi Sifri wrote and performed some good songs in the 70s I've not heard of him since.
3 comments
Just for Laughs
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Two scrap metal merchants at the gates of heaven, St.Peter looks at them and says, hold on a minute, I'll have to have a word with God, God tells him we don't want their sort in here, get rid of them, he goes and returns, they've gone, good says God,...
5 comments
Critical thinking
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
I thought this group would be teeming with Brights, where are you all? Where are the stimulating questions one would expect?
9 comments
Just for Laughs
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A chap arrived home and looked around for his wife, I'm up here she called, he went into the bedroom and she was standing naked in front of the mirror fondling her breasts... what are you doing? I've had my well-woman checkup and the doc said I have ...
8 comments
Trump Pinata
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
American voters must be embarrassed having a President who sabre rattles with foreign powers on Twitter? It's become like a comic book, are the administration aware when he does it? Perhaps he's on the John!
16 comments
Music Fans
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
I have adored music of all sorts since childhood. I admire musicians and songwriters their enormous talent in being different the millions of songs ever penned. One of my regrets in life is that I have no musical ability personally and could not ...
3 comments
50s +
May 20, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Typical, looks like everyones forgotten they joined this group!
13 comments
Just for Laughs
May 19, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A man who threw Domestos over the pope has now been charged with "A bleach of the priest"
5 comments
Just for Laughs
May 19, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
The earliest reference a motorcycle is in the Holy Bible "and the roar of Moses' Triumph could be heard throughout the land"
9 comments
Just for Laughs
May 18, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
You level 8 people are quite up there and hard to please but thanks for the posts, It warms my heart to know that our agnostic community is kinder and more forgiving than our religious counterparts, whoever heard of us burning people we disagreed ...
12 comments
Just for Laughs
May 18, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
I'm really sorry if my silly jokes don't cheer your face up! Have you tried sucking a lemon?
6 comments
Just for Laughs
May 18, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Newsflash, there is definitely no God, if there were, members who post "GROAN" as a comment would be struck by lightning! Perhaps if they were more groan up they would say something constructive, did I make a joke there, hahaha! or groan as they say!
9 comments
50s +
May 18, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Than their parents, sorry!
1 comment
50s +
May 18, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Why is it that grandparents are far more patient and tolerant of children that their parents? We are supposed to become grumpy old gits!
15 comments
Just for Laughs
May 17, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A snail went to a police station, I've been mugged he told the sergeant, by two big slugs, really said the cop, can you describe these slugs to me? well not really, it all happened so quickly....
9 comments
50s +
May 17, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
It has not been the speed of light really but I thought most people would enjoy the E=MC2 bit!
2 comments
Music Fans
May 17, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Hello fellow music lovers, one of my favourite all time songs is Waterloo sunset by the Kinks, I have it on good authority that the reference Terry and Julie pertained Terrence Stamp and Julie Christie who were dating at that time!
1 comment
50s +
May 17, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
E does equal MC squared, since I was 50 time has passed much faster than before, anybody else noticed that?
13 comments
Just for Laughs
May 17, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Professor of English talking with a barman, so, why do you need a professor of English, you either speak it or you don't. It's a very complex language, ambiguous, how do you mean? Take the word shag for example, to an ornithologist it's a sea-bird, ...
6 comments
Just for Laughs
May 16, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
A lady visits her doctor, what can I help you with he asks, the lady lifts her dress revealing her panties with a bit of lettuce sticking out, oh dear said the doctor, yes she said, and thats just the tip of the Iceberg.....
6 comments
Just for Laughs
May 15, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Betty says to Will, Will, we have been dating for a year now and you have never touched me down there... between your legs? said Will, of course not, but why said Betty, well It's the teeth of course, what teeth? my mother told me about them! You ...
3 comments
Critical thinking
May 13, 2019May 2019

Posted by Austin-Cambridge
Great group and excellent subject, you may well have created a forum for brights! Thanks RichieO
1 comment