I have been seeing someone for about a month. We decided to take a long drive to new hope, pa(wonderful little town I recommend). What I learned is that I really really suck at small talk. I am usually fine with long moments of silence. But when you are trying to impress someone it becomes an awkward silence. And now I remember one of the reasons I suck at dating. I was wracking my brain and came up with some lame topics. Anyone else have this issue?
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Lol sorry I know a lot of people feel awkward with long pauses in conversations. I love to gab away especially to strangers. I also enjoy silence especially with those I know well. Its like we don't need words.
But don't worry she likes you or she wouldn't of went on the drive. If she wanted conversion she would be asking questions or pointing out the landscape.
SCbeelady
Level 6
June 17, 2018
0
I agree with a lot of the folks below -- I don't think this is a real problem. If she didn't like you she wouldn't have agreed to go with you. If she's been seeing you for a month, there is obviously something going on. If it makes you nervous before you see her, don't you take a few minutes and think about the things you talked about on previous dates. Or look at the news and see if there's something you would both be interested in. OR don't you talk about how it is to engage in small talk when you like someone. I'll bet you get reassurance and once she knows you worry about it, I bet the problem disappears. Give yourself some credit! It's been sixteen years since I've been seeing someone for a month!
ladyprof70
Level 7
June 17, 2018
0
Not my problem, as a Patty Heart-Type survivor of violence, I find it easy to babble on....anything to keep from being beaten/killed!
AnneWimsey
Level 9
June 17, 2018
0
Should have gone to Paradise or Intercourse, but I wouldn't recommend Blue Ball....Yes those PA Towns...lol
Humanity4all
Level 6
June 17, 2018
1
Yes. It is something that I also recently noticed about myself. I can do it all day in my job but not so much in my personal life. I am beginning to think that I am more shallow that I had thought.....
patchoullijulie
Level 8
June 17, 2018
2
That's the exact opposite of shallow, I think. Small talk is the epitome of shallowness. It sounds like you're better at deeper, engaging conversation. I've found that a lot of people (especially casual acquaintances) have no interest in discussing more serious topics that require careful and nuanced thought, so I spend a lot of time in silence with people as well.
I find that most people do not share my interests and that makes it difficult to speak to them unless I engage in talk about them. This results in my asking many questions about their lives and they find out nothing about me. The latter makes me appear cold to them.
@resserts mmmI hadn't looked at it in quite that way. Got me thinking now. Thanks 
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