So I have come to the conclusion that everyone who is religious is nuts as fuck. So I have decided to create my own religion and read from several books instead.

And lo, the Dark Lord hath put down James, he ascended the stairs where he beheld Lily hovering over her child. For it was prophecy he would be destroyed by the savior.

And with a quick utterance of the worst of the unforgiveable curses, Lily twas put down as well, but in doing so, hath given her life for her child and old magic protected the savior from the dark one, who upon trying, was, himself, put down, not to return for many a year in various forms.

It was then that the teachers descended upon the home and took the boy to the sister of the holy mother where he would toil under the stair for many a year until he would be invited to the mighty school of Hogwarts.

Let us pray.

Oh, Harry, you who art thou with a lightning bolt upon thyne brow, who vanquished the basilisk, who beat the eaters of death, who made friends with a ginger and a hot nerd and eventually the asshole who couldn't tell daddy anymore.

Watch over us, with your power, for you chose the right girl in the end to marry and fuck, but also, the asian would've been totally hot too and she was so looking for a shoulder to cry on after that guy died and you could've totally given her your broom, but you chose to marry into Ron's family, which is okay, because ginger chicks are the best, I should know, I am one, Amen.

That is all for today, we will be reading from the Goblet of Fire next Sunday and talking about the good and bad of the movie, namely, twilight actor bad, David Tennant good.

Aaaaand that's basically a new religion. Course I do got other books...hmmm....religion of Deadpool? Green Lantern? No, no...HOWARD THE DUCK!