Monogamy seems historically to have stemmed from a time when marriage in all it's forms was basicly a form of registered ownership of one or more women by a man. The current overlay of romantic love as a part of the marriage contract is historically very recent. So a loose non monogamous set of relationships based on mutual trust and friendship could be quite possible and workable.

There are a few instances in nature of monogamy. The only one I can think of is the bald eagle but there are others. I don't believe man was meant to be monogamous. I see polygamy as a more natural condition where multiple partners all love each other. In northern Europe many couples don't bother to get married because they realistically believe that they will eventually grow apart. The bond for life isn't life affirming it very well may be life choking.

I've never been in a relationship, so speaking pretty much as an outsider, I wouldn't recommend it. From what I've seen of relationships, it wasn't what I expected growing up as a kid. Most of the relationships I've seen: one partner doesn't like the family or friends of the other, or doesn't like a huge chunk of the other's life, sometimes they whine at each other as their most common form of communication, they break up and get back together multiple times. I've really only seen 1/10 relationships that I deem to be successful. And that's just between two people. Throw one more into the mix, and I doubt it will work out as intended. It would take some seriously level-headed people who have shed any and all pre-established notions of monogamy implanted by religion, community, family, media, etc. Otherwise, I don't see a good success rate anytime soon in our state of cultural affairs.

To each their own I'm exploring polyamory myself currently. As long as no one is being hurt on purpose then all is good!

I think honestly is more important than monogamy. Humans are not naturally monogamous, but it is a cultural more mostly likely conceived to reduce conflicts and jealousies within villages in times past. Also, in part as a way of subjugating women, as most of ht etime it is only meant to apply to women.

Monogamy is (or at least was) not culturally universal. Monogamy is a nice romantic idealized notion, that is far from the reality of how humans actually behave.

Humans are animals with instincts, and instinctual drive often overcome intellectual desires, because our reasoning abilities are still relatively new by comparison with the sexual drive, and I have said it elsewhere on this site, but just because (some) humans are capable of rational thought does not make us rational beings. People do stupid things that they know are wrogn all the time. Our instincts which helpe us survive on the savanna, are still operating and come otu as "emotions."

The question of monogamy comes down to how much does your intellect have control over your animal instincts? It is different for everyone, but most people simply are not capable of being monogamous, simply because of the way they are hard wired and they do not have the intellectual control over their instincts well enough to keep such a commitment.

So, although I too night like a monogamous partner/spouse, I don't think that is a realistic expectation. So, insist on honesty. As long as my partner/spouse isnt' keeping secrets from me, I can feel secure about having strong relationship.

Secrets and lies drive wedges between you and honety helps keep you closer together.

Although we are not biologically monogamous, I am 100% monogamous in a relationship. Extra curricular activities many work for other couples, but not for me. Sex outside of a relationship is always a potential threat to the pair bond. I am not comfortable with it at all. When I am in a relationship, of course I will notice an attractive man. Then I can turn to my partner and make love with him. The sex is much more than a physical pleasure and release. For me it does strengthen the pair bond.