Tell me a Noah Ark story like a comedian. I laugh at all of them. LOL Creationist have Noah Ark and Creationism museums. Plus plans to educate children in all US schools. Two views conflicting evolutionary humanism vs. Creatiism according to Genesis. Earth and all of its life form were created 6000 years ago in over six-day period, plus +++ origins of the Universe. They claim humans and dinosaurs coexisted. Better to laugh than to cry, don't take them seriously. Like biologist debating Flat earth society.

No animals were harmed in the making of this story, except when the boat landed. The.carnivores drop their carrots and lettuce and return back to eating meat.

God chosen Noah and his family to survive. Noah was not a day older than 500. Wail the rest of the human race, will be blot out from the face of the earth. Trillions of animals must die over one wicked specie's. Making the mosquito seem sweet & very nice.

Noah had special wood , so the boat would not break apart loaded to the wazoo by millions of species and their crap. To build a wood boat soooooo big and tough. Gives God a woody. Not even middle age Noah who stood 9 feet tall could match. Not even penis like nuclear missles today could match.

At the time all animals were vegetarian and loveable, zebras would share with T-Rex as their teeth were design to eat hard carrots. Brontosaurus could be baby sized. How convenient. Noah thought its plausible yet he still had to gather all the animals of the world and walk them to Babylon, when the earth is covered in 3/4 water, with three times more water yet to come. A wheel barrow was not invented until 200AD. Give a snail and an Australian sloth a 100 years to get there. Without God's miracle help.  Or was it, :Make the Ark and they will COME:.
No wonder, God lives in the Dark.

God simplified production by using a wolf to represent all breeds of dogs that branch out to wild and domestic dogs. Or a black bear for them to evolve into polar, grizzly, and koala bears. An evolution of Christians science and intelligent design for shleeps. Sheep herders did not have zippers to alarm their sheep.

Noah was a Supernatural hero.. When the rain reached the height of Mount Everest. Noah build a dome out of hay, a great insulator. Used animal manuer for heating the tropical animals from freezing to death. Then Noah scientifically created oxygen out of sea water as animal can't breathe at that height of 30,000 feet, except a turkey vulture.

Gods rainbow was his harmless promise not to kill us, until the next story? Untitled-
¶¶Jesus Christ is Coming to town.~
You better watch out,
You better get saved,
You better repent.
I'M TELLING YOU WHY!!!

~¶For he will be riding Red nose Dragons when he comes.¶¶
An Aldult version of Satan Claus.