@whispers Really? Most guys do that?

@Sticks48

Women, too.

I have reached the point where I feel surprised when a man looks like his photos.

@whispers I don't look at mens profiles, not that there is anything wrong with that.

@Sticks48

"How old are your photos?" I asked on the phone. This was my latest foray into the shitshow of modern dating.

About five years old," he replied. "I haven't changed."

"Men always think they haven't changed," I said wearily. "Please send me a selfie taken today. I want to see what you look like now."

He sent me:

1. A nude. Ew! Poor judgment and highly inappropriate.

2. A selfie with a two-foot, long white beard. Ugh. Brings to mind Duck Dynasty, backwoods hermits and orthodox Hasidic Jews.

Declined to meet him.

@LiterateHiker I guess I don't get it. If you think you might actually meet someone online, what is to be gained?

@LiterateHiker, @whispers Amazing! What is to be gained by phony pics and lying?

@Sticks48

Apparently people believe their innate sexual heat and sparkling personality will make you overlook the fact that they lied.

"I got you to meet me, didn't I?" a man said defensively. I blanched when he stepped out of his truck. He looked like the grandfather of the man in his photos. He saw the look on my face.

He admitted that he was 74 (he looked 80), and had posted 15-year old photos. On his profile, he listed his age as 55.

@whispers Very much so.

@whispers

Exactly. Every man I met who posted his height as 5' 7" was actually shorter than me. I'm 5' 5" tall.

It felt like hugging my kid brother.

@Sticks48 - I think the reason that I am hopeful (about meeting someone via an online introduction) is that I don't have a lot of choices for meeting men who might be someone with whom I'd like to have a relationship. I do not hang out in bars (or anywhere, for that matter), I do not work, I do not attend a church or synagogue, where else do I meet people? I tend to believe people, so have been surprised to find that people might not be exactly truthful, but most people want to present their best "side", and current photos might not be appropriate for that illusion. Outright lies, however, wow, that would be a deal-breaker, no question!

@LiterateHiker - want a man to be taller than I am... I don't want to feel elephantine, or giraffe-like compared to someone claiming to be ... 5'10" or taller. I am 5'6", and I met one man who'd said he was 5'10", but I could look him in the eye. There is nothing wrong with not being tall. There are all sorts of things wrong with lying about it... and about what else would someone be willing to lie? No more lies in my life, thank you, I got rid of the man who'd started lying to me. Don't want to deal with that again, and that is a really bad way to try to start a relationship!

@Rustee

"How many kids do you have?" I asked the man with a Santa Claus beard.

"Nine," he replied.

"Did you say NINE kids?" I replied, shocked. "Your poor wife! Haven't you heard of overpopulation?"

He was previously a Mormon. Church leaders urged Mormons to have as many children as possible. "The more children you have, the higher your level in heaven."

"I became a nudist in reaction to the Mormon Church," he said, adding that his wife divorced him because he wasn't Mormon enough. "When I turned atheist, I decided to be a nudist."

It appears he swings from one extreme to another. Not my cup of tea.

@LiterateHiker - Yikes! Definitely a wild swing there, scary indeed... I understand why the mormon leaders tell their people to have a lot of children - who knows what the heaven situation is truly - but at least they are increasing the population of mormon people....