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I find myself being silent when a friend who is very religious suffers a tragedy or a loss. I certainly do not offer "thoughts and prayers". That would be hypocritical. I will listen to them tell me that "He/She is in a better place" etc. and provide comfort where I can. What methods do you (In this group) employ?

Veazeyj 4 Mar 19

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It’s quite interesting that you posted this. I have recently tragically lost my elder son and I have received over a hundred cards and letters of condolence, the overwhelming majority of them from people who are friends and who know that I am an atheist. I only got three or four messages of a religious nature, and these were from people who probably weren’t aware that I didn’t believe in god. I was very pleased to see that my friends all respected my views and none of them offered prayers, although they may have done so to their god without telling me. They have all been wonderful and shown me true human love, and all without mentioning god, those who came to the Humanist funeral service also saying how beautiful it was. As far as your question is concerned, I just say to my friends when they’ve been bereaved, that they must think of all the happy memories they have to cherish, and that I am there for them to love and comfort them if they wish to talk I will sit with them and listen. If they do say anything along the lines of them being in a better place, I wisely say nothing. If it brings them comfort to think so, so be it.

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So sorry for your loss, how can I help? Tell you what, I'll come round and do your laundry.

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I say, "You know I don't believe, but I want to do something to help you." and generally that means cooking for them, running errands, hosting things... I've rarely been turned down, but ascribed that to my offers being practical help (rather than to my lack of religion).

Oh we have the same idea. #readtheotherpostsJayne

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