“Myself unto myself will give
This name Catharsis-Purgative.
I, who dishevelled ways forsook
To hold the poets' grammar-book,
Bringing to tavern and to brothel
The mind of witty Aristotle.”
James Joyce

“Writing in English is the most ingenious torture ever devised for transgressions committed in previous incarnations. “
James Joyce (1882 - 1941)

In a similar vein...

"Ghoti"

"GH" as in "enough"
"O" as in "women"
"TI" as in "nation"

Here's a poem I wrote at school, some sixty plus years ago, using different spellings for the same sound (rhyme)

I find it really quite absurd
That when an Englishman is heard
To say an ordinary word
Its spelling cannot be inferred.
For he follows not the common herd
With gutteral, brogue or vowel, well stirred
His speech, if sober, is not slurred
But rings out clearly, as a bird.

Oh! Pity the foreigner, gaping dumbly,
When he first encounters the name of Cholmondeley.

Yeah yeah. English is for yankees. We speak 'MURICAN™️ down here. The only English we care about is muffins.

Sums it up

Yikes, that one makes my head hurt. I'm all for ditching at least half of these antiquated Olde English bullshit words. Yeah, I'm an iconoclast thru and thru.