Voters Doubt That Biden Really has the Ability to Mobilize Trunalimunumaprzure

At an event this week, presidential hopeful Joe Biden claimed that if elected, he will lead an effective strategy to mobilize trunalimunumaprzure.

However, many people do not think he will be able to accomplish this lofty goal.

“I don’t think he can do it,” said Daryl Hopkins, a local shopkeeper in Allentown, Pennsylvania. “If he had a strategy to mobilize trunalimunumaprzure, why didn’t he do it in his first 47 years in office?”

Dr. Dick Davis of the University of Pennsylvania is considered an expert on trunalimunumaprzure, and he said that many have tried many different strategies to mobilize it, but none have ever gotten it right.

“Trunalimunumaprzure is a fickle mistress,” Dr. Davis said. “I will tell you this: it’s bold for Joe Biden to come out and say he has a trunalimunumaprzure strategy. You’ll notice that Donald Trump never even mentions trunalimunumaprzure. I’ll bet if you went through his entire political history, you won’t find Trump even saying the word ‘trunalimunumaprzure.’ That’s because Trump knows the hassle that comes along with trunalimunumaprzure, so he’s not even going to touch it.”

“If Joe Biden could really mobilize trunalimunumaprzure, then I’d vote for him,” said Molly Sweetcakes, a waitress at a highway side Waffle House in Lewisburg. “But I don’t think he has what it takes. If I had a nickle for every time I heard a politician say he’s going to mobilize the trunalimunumaprzure, I’d be a millionaire and I’d go tell my boss to take this job and shove it.”

One thing’s for certain: trunalimunumaprzure is now a part of this election.

With just hours left before election day, will Trump himself come out with a statement on trunalimunumaprzure? Does he have a strategy?

Trump has a hard time keeping his mouth shut on issues. If he enters the trunalimunumaprzure debate, that could become the focus of the election as voters head to the polls.