@Ceaselessmind I was diagnosed with Type II in 1992.....felt very angry and very hopeless as it runs deep in my family and I have seen close-up the awful long-term side effects. Went into denial for decades, on and off...took my meds but otherwise pretended I was Fine.
Then a combo of diabetes meds ( Victoza + Avandia, you can nowadays Google it!) killed off part of my heart so now I have fatal Congestive Heart Failure too....diagnosed in 2018 when I literally stopped breathing.

However, for 3+ years I have strictly followed a very low carb diet and just 3 weeks ago stopped all diabetes meds including off all insulin, which I had been injecting since 2010.....there is Hope for diabetes and it is within your control!!!!!!

And my Cardiologists are astonished by my lack of decline as well........they expected me dead/disabled on the way to death in 5 years. Not so much...I just remodeled my kitchen, and my yard, home, pool, have never been in better shape.
The difference in my outlook, by gaining control over a "hopeless" disease (2 of them, actually!!) by my own efforts has been Astounding!!!!!

Maybe it is time for you to make some changes that will give you a feeling of control? I highly recommend anything in that area!

@Ceaselessmind You have to work at it every day, it gets easier the longer you do it.

@Ceaselessmind, From my perspective, who was on the edge of death a couple of times, things are a bit different. Things Have to be different W/O me! Besides my main career, I see sometimes a little action can make a huge difference.
Just try small random kindness to animals and ppl. around! doesn't matter how small is it. sometimes these little things made me cry, cry of enjoyment, and pity about why I didn't do that for whole my life.
I can't explain how hard my life is in some aspects (like every living being) but I've successfully managed to make it a bit easier and nicer.
My actions are my answer to "Randomness & Possibilities", to fill some little gaps.
small random kindness is Interaction with the outside in a good way, a perfect way to yell: "I exist", to mark your sign, like a Hand sign on a cave, what our ancestors did. that's the Art's purpose.
to me, besides my career success, it's heartwarming to see a cat/dog waiting on the street to get fed by me, when someone smile because of me, when buy a meal for a homeless person, when do a little help with my colleagues and employees... etc. ( yeah, things get complicated somehow with love! and I've decided to be in that way for my own reasons... )

@Ceaselessmind I've just checked all your previous posts. have a better picture now; seems you just need to be involved in a relationship. Loneliness will break everyone down. your BP, anxiety and depression are symptoms, Not the root! try harder to find your mate, I know sounds lame, but the truth is someone is out there for you.

@Ceaselessmind My friend, I don't want to bother you. I feel you and your disappointment, but even this despair and anger of that BS is another sign to prove my point. The irony is Somehow I'm in the same boat W U, just my responsibilities, dreams and those little things won't let me down. but I have the same empty area in my heart too, and am seeing how loneliness sometimes tries to crash me down. at least I'm aware my issue is standing there. anyhow you can count on me as your friend.

@Ceaselessmind It's OK. Perhaps one day we can play some online games together! for now, I'm under pressure on some projects! you know this platform and fellows like you help a lot to keep my mental balance! otherwise, I'm emotionless like a robot in my damn office!
And No my friend, sometimes we have so many in common, way more than we can ever imagine!
Honestly, I'm Not wasting any of my time, you're somehow Me and I hope there be someone for me when I'm down blue.
IDK, perhaps I'm projecting myself, but what I'm sure about is Loneliness is the root of so many issues ( consciously and unconsciously ).