How do I find love when I don't know how to start a conversation?
Having some experience with different types of autism (young family member is PDD-NOS; was a nanny to a nonverbal young man), I suggest you volunteer at something you enjoy or support: Special Olympics, cancer drives, dinners to support someone who had a tragedy strike. Interacting with people will get you closer to your goal. Good luck.
Go up to a person you're interested in and ask them, "If you were stranded on an island, would you rather be with me or that guy?" And just point at any guy. From there, different responses and jokes will ensue. I say you practice them. A big misunderstanding in our current culture is that it all has to be spontaneous. But I think if you pre-create, rehearse, and perform it well, that could be your bread and butter.
I ask girls about video games all the time, because at that point we all know where we stand on a not inflammatory, but still divisive issue. If they're not down with the Mass Effect, that's like minus 22 compatibility points for the bof of us.
Technically you just started a conversation here, and chatting online with people is a useful way to increase your conversation skills and your confidence in holding a conversation. There's no real replacement for actual face-to-face conversations in person though, and it is a skill you can develop.
Here are a few tricks you might find useful:
Meanwhile, people are more interesting and attractive when they are confident and comfortable with who they are. You don't need to be super confident in every situation, but if you are generally happy as a person and happy with yourself, that will show and people respond well to it. Don't make dating your top priority. Focus on yourself and your own interests. People who are passionate about life and who enjoy what they do are more interesting and more attractive. Perhaps join a meetup group for something you're interested in - that can be a good way to meet people. Doesn't have to be with people you would date - every conversation is good practice.
Having said all that, I'm divorced and generally shy myself, so take it all with a grain of salt hehe
Ask questions of the other person, do not make lame complements which never come off right. Look very interested in their answers. Keep the focus on them, not yourself. Keep saying, "That's interesting. Can you tell me more about it?" You will know if they are not really interested in you. And relax. Predators in nature are only successful 1 in 10 times, and making a love interest has about the same odds. Sorry for the predators analogy. I'm a biologist.
I have always been incredibly shy when talking to people in person. I tend to be attracted to more outgoing men who are easy to talk to, which actually has helped. If they approach me first it's much easier. I don't think I've ever been the one to start anything ???? Just be patient. Someone will come along and you just "click".
Just sit there staring at her and hope the waiter arrives soon, "ahem, aaaahhhh . . . are you on a diet?"
Try to listen to Randy Crawford's "One Hello"
'Cause love begins with one hello
The hardest part is over
Now it's easy letting go
One hello is how it starts
You might win it all
Always start with a compliment and a smile followed by a short story to keep the conversation going. For instance, "wow, you sure dressed right on for this weather. I wish I had remembered my gloves. It's freezing out there, isn't it?"
Small thoughtful gestures generate great feedback also. For instance, " Here, jump in front of me in line, I'm in no hurry. I would love a few extra karma points." (Big smile)
*That's just a little female advice.
If it makes you feel better, us extroverts don't really have any more luck finding love. ????
I figure I'm going to enjoy my life and make connections wherever I go. Maybe love will find me, but regardless, I'll have fun doing things that make me happy.
As for starting conversations, I prefer a friendly hello and a smile. Works surprisingly well.