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My poetry. Early. Hard to share, but any thoughts? Thanks in advance.

FoundMyNietzsche 6 May 12
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6 comments

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0

Good poetry. I especially like the first one.

0

These are beautiful.

0

I am sad. I wish I could hug the person who wrote this. Still you?

0

Makes me want to beat the hell out of whoever did this to you. The poems would be more intense if you could preface it with a time line of other poems leading up to this emotional outburst. At one time there must have been deep feeling for this person, look to that to find solace, good word positioning, graphic visual, well defined. You are a writer.

0

Grammar Nazi stuff:

It's = it is
Its = belonging to it

So, lose the apostrophe in "Heartless".

That's my contribution ... I'm way to literal minded to go beyond that, but I'm sure others will have thoughts.

0

Red it and my first thought was that you are hurting.

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