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Rare personal b**** here. I hate it when long time lady friends decide to start calling me buddy. To me what that says, this is the polite way of saying I'm better than you are, we're just friends, so don't think it'll ever be anything more, and you're lucky just to even have me talk to you. Maybe I'm too sensitive, but I consider it to be garbage and condescension.

SonOfABeach 7 May 19
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4 comments

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2

I don’t see it as too sensitive: it is what you feel. ( I have a finely tuned instinct for what others really mean by their words, so I get that.)
Have you addressed the issue with any of them?

1

Now, you just called them lady friends yourself. If they are love interests you should say so. That being said I can imagine how frustrating ut is when your crush calls you buddy.

4

Not at all "I'm better than you are", IMO a perfectly acceptable way to let you know you are in the friend zone.

3

Funny you say that, as you started your post referring to "Ladies" saying Buddy and I have several friends who are offended by the use of ladies. I thought that odd and when I ask why they have this interpretation that the man is too old fashioned or a misogynist. I think when we try to make meaning of what others say, we are making it up, as we really have no idea their personal meaning. I don't think you are too sensitive, just think you should consider your interpretation, hell all that we interpret is coming through our world view and whatever is going on at the moment. So it is possible someone happens to think that, but if you really want to know, be brave and ask. Communicate. If I heard it, they consider you a good friend, but I am making that up too. For me being a good friend has been the basis of all my long term relationships. Just ask and share your feelings.
I have also had experiences where I meet men and really connect with them and have a lot in common and we remain friends for years. And others I would love to go hiking with and spend time together, I have others that consider a woman not having romantic feelings for them an insult or consolation prize. I don't completely get that, but have always had many male friends that there is no romantic connection or at least one yet made, even several of my exes are still friends or at least not adversaries. If you don't have the same thing in mind, you will know and hey, there is value in that. Just my 2 cents.

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