Thinking about my life and relationships and sometimes it just throws me for a loop when I least expect it. Like first thing this morning. So I write. Tell me about your moments...

I found myself wandering this morning, in half sleep
Sudden memories pummeling me
from somewhere down deep
I stumbled to the sink
Not sure I needed a drink, just somewhere to lean
I felt the familiar tightening
The tears beginning
A sudden and unwelcome surge
This is my life now
Right here, this purge
Cold tile beneath my bare feet
Trying not to cry
Not even sure of the reason why
Only that time has fled and waved goodbye
While the movie played, kept me enthralled
And I was swayed to believe it all
That somehow all of this would never completely leave
Yet, the people I loved left me
and I have left them
And just now, I can't remember where or when
I have held on, thinking I was brave
When letting go showed me what I couldn't save
Really, there is no keeping what you never had
It's so sad, that realization
How the bad memories stay, the good memories fade
Our debt never being paid
as life wriggles unbidden through clenched fingertips
Just a quick exhaled sigh from pursed lips
An unknown horizon calling
Rose petals dying, falling
Even as I wander these blurry mornings, in half sleep
That's all it is
That's all it is...

Flying Angel © 2018
Photo from Pinterest