Not the first, but the nail in the coffin was when I took a New Testament as Literature class in college. Finding out that the “gospel truth” was hardly that cemented my doubts on my religion, as well as others. Certain conservative family members of mine would roll their eyes SO hard if they knew it was a “liberal” establishment that eroded my faith, but I’m just thankful I understand myself and the world around me a little better from the experience.
I began to lose my faith in the xtian religion when I realized how truly ridiculous the "work of god" sounded. I found refuge in pagan beliefs. I lost my faith in those beliefs as I tried to find my place and didn't fit anywhere I looked.
The longer I stay separate from organized beliefs the more I see collected superstitions that are no longer necessary to explain how life works.
Well, I was raised Mormon. So... the preisthood ban was one of the things. But I’m pretty sure the homophobic things had a big part in it. It was a while ago. But I could never get behind that. & in hindsight that makes perfect sense for me. Since I am bisexual.
Oh! And I went to school in South Africa for a bit. So being in a place where practically no one was of the same faith as me had me questioning real early.
Growing up, it was always a recurring thought to me that god wasn't like most other "friends" I had. I'd never physically met Him, despite claiming we were best buddies. He had more in common with the few imaginary friends I made up as a child. I tried to maintain absolute faith, but that thought kept coming, and it resulted in several severe "crises of faith" over the years.
I was raised in a strict Catholic family. I was a teenager in the 1960s and was very shy (a "late bloomer" ). I went to confession every week and church every Sunday. After an experience being molested when I was younger, I was careful to try to be a 'good girl'. We had to change churches, and I went to confession for the first time at my new parish; when I was finished, the priest said "Is that it?" and when I said yes, he made it clear that he didn't believe me and started to give me the third degree about what I had done with boys, and went so far as to make me feel like a liar and a tramp, when I knew I was none of those things. I ran out of there crying and devastated, and never went back. I felt betrayed that a person who was touted as being the embodiment of God on earth could be so cruel to someone who was being honest.
So many things come to mind. It's been years since I was a bible banger. But looking back, I think the first thing that comes to mind that made me question a higher power was all the unanswered prayers. All the conflicting prayers ie. opposing teams. And the hypocracy of how the bible tells you to pray, and how most christians do it.
There is a passage in the old testament about the worship of molech. It says that god was watching, as the ammonite people passed their children through the fire. (ritualistic sacrificial burning of babies) God was upset. (Still didn't stop it, though.) He said that it never even entered his mind to do such a thing to his children...yet there's a hell for that very purpose. Obviously I am paraphrasing and oversimplifying the scripture passages, but you get the gyst. Now, either god was lying or changed his mind, because the ammonites had a good idea. Either way, it's an evil idea. Either way, it's bullshit. The writers were getting a little too creative in their control-through-fear tactics when they threw the idea of hell into the mix.