@LiterateHiker I too problem solve I once went into a burning house to use the phone (before mobile phones) to get help, I calmly worked out that the fire wasn't going to get to the area where the phone was, how I was going to dial if I couldn't see and went in with wet coat over my mouth and nose so I wouldn't breathe in smoke. I fell to pieces hours later.

On a Friday night February 13th 1976 my mother woke me up sometime after 11 screaming for help I got out of bed and found her in the bathroom standing next to my father who was unconscious on the floor. He was not breathing I told my mother to call an ambulance and the fire department and began giving my father CPR. We lived in a rural area and an ambulance was at least 10 miles away the fire department was all volunteer they took approximately 15 to 20 minutes to arrive where they relieve me of the CPR duties my mother had called my aunt who live 45 minutes away to come to the house when the ambulance arrived about a half an hour later my mother left in the fire department stayed until my aunt got there. She was a volunteer EMT in the town that she lived in I tried to reassure me that everything was going to be okay. I knew otherwise I could feel my father's life was body while trying to give him CPR and felt as though he was not responding the entire time it took for the ambulance to arrive. I knew he was dead as it turns out when my mother came home 3 in the morning I was correct in my assumption my father was dead. I had been in boy scouts for a number of years before that and wanted to get my first aid merit badge and was denied it because the person that taught me first aid was not the instructor in our troop. The hypocrisy of the thing was that they ordered it to me after that night. My father's death certificate was not Friday the 13th of that February because he was not officially declared dead until well after midnight on the 14th of February I guess you could say these two days are special to me. The next iron e I guess is recent I have a doctor's appointment coming up this February 14th and the receptionist jokedthat I would get to see all the ladies in the office that day and I laughed. I told her that the date had a different significance for me it was the day that my father had died. And she expressed her condolences and I laughed back because the other irony was the doctor's office I was going to it was my surgical oncologist. I have been free of cancer now for a little under a year and that really hasn't FaZe my life at all either. Other than the physical down turns that I've had to deal with but I'm still very enthusiastic about life and haven't really thought much about the cancer except for the toll and it has played upon my body. I think when stressful situations come up you need to not only think outside of the box but mentally step outside of the box also to remove yourself from the situation so as not to let it bother you as much. I have many many more stories that I can share I had neurological Lyme disease that went untreated for a very long time just prior to being diagnosed with cancer also I don't want to get into that conversation now. If anyone is interested in Lyme disease look me up on here and I know too much about it more than probably most of the doctors in the area . I hope this was helpful to someone thank you.

I seem to be wired to stay calm in emergencies. I rely on the Stoic philosophy I have learned to embrace, which is that I can control my emotions and how I choose to react to circumstances, not the circumstances themselves. I experience emotions but never, ever lose it.

Family, work, outings (camping, etc) and even the military (including experiencing a ship collision at sea) I always did well, at least until about eight years ago when my psyche gave up for a brief while, but that is not what I want to comment upon, that had multiple layers. Anyway, I was working a volunteer phone line, that also did CRISIS calls late at night before they were full time (early 90's). I got my first suicide call and I, Mr. Calm, panicked. The caller, feeling badly for me, not himself, promised he wouldn't do anything in order to help calm me down. Success at stopping my first suicide.

Yes, I have.
But the important thing here is that YOU are "taking care of business" for your family. I salute you brave woman!

I start making lists and plans and micromanaging.

Glad the cancer fear was a false alarm.

I share your response when dealing with crisis. Evaluate, plan, and calmly implement the best perceived plant to resolve or prevent further loss.