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Why Do People Contact Profiles That State the Opposite of What They Are!?!?

Why do people, in my case - men, ignore what someone took the time, to write in a profile and contact the people anyways?

Do you think, the person you're contacting, despite what s/he has written, doesn't know, what s/he wants and you, a total stranger, knows better!?

I sincerely, would like some insights on this.

IslandGyal 5 Nov 28
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14 comments

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0

I can't speak for others,but learned the hard way to read and consider what was contained within the profile before commenti g?

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Hi, I red your profile, which I liked but personally I think you are asking for something that is an impossibility to achieve. At my age I have tried and there just is not such a man on this earth. They all see you as a challenge. Sorry girl.

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Repeating what others have said here, that's a pretty cool profile! I don't think these guys who are contacting you are even reading at it; clearly, they're not thinking with their heads, but with another organ instead... Or they want a challenge, I don't know... Anyway, it has absolutely nothing to do with you. Anyone who's worth it is going to put thought and consideration into their response. Unfortunately that seems rare.

0

Well, DAMN woman!!! Go you!!!

After reading DoNotBelieve's post, I had to check out your profile, too.
Hope you get everything you want.

0

If someone doesn't like to have strangers contacting them, why does that person have a profile in a public site?.... I don't have the answer to your question, which instead has triggered my thoughts into asking a different question

@IslandGyal obviously ??

0

Damn, I read @Donotbelieve 's reply and had to read your bio as well. I'm going to have to agree you're pretty badass. I had to look up "ammosexual" LOL!!

As far as men, there's a lot of us who don't pay much attention to profiles in the "swipe right" dating world we live in. The spray n pray approach to dating is a lot more common than understood. The guys that used to get rejected in a bar and turn around to the next woman and try again, now can reach many more women and with far less initial effort, meaning more men who weren't confident enough to try it in person use those same tactics online.

Just a note, in your bio you're looking for an "über aware, intelligent, EDUCATED, witty, generous, thoughtful, altruistic, virile, liberal to moderate man's man, who isn't a neanderthal" and then wanted to know if that's too much to ask. I'll be honest, I know 2 guys who would hit everything on that list, and both are afraid of skydiving. Good Luck 😉

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I've only had the problem once here. It took a few messages to convince the fellow I'm a man, seeking a woman. Even the full beard in a photo didn't seem to slow his attentions. Too many 'hey babe' and 'You're beautiful' messages.

1

Perhaps acting on the photo and not the bio.

0

Because they are fake

1

Probably because we are still driven primarily by physical attractiveness to a large extent. It may not be the only factor but enough to at least reach out.
I don't care too much to have everything in common with someone because part of what is fun about life is seeing things from new perspectives. You don't do that much if you have everything in common.

I mean just 2 thoughts.

I doubt women are as persistent as men if there is a clear, not interested, delivered. I know that 100% works for me but my female friends tell stories of epic persistence that I am amazed by. I dislike making people feel uncomfortable even though I think it is part of my nature to do so either intentionally or subconsciously at times but disengage pretty quickly and easily.

@IslandGyal You are going to be soooo attractive to some though, agreed? I mean different people have different preferences. I like to think we all appeal to someone that way....we definitely all appeal to different people in different ways.

I get the creep factor. That is unfortunate but I guess you can block them? I don't know...I don't have any lurkers

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I think some of them find it’s like a red rag to a bull, and a challenge to them! Not very bright, but there are still quite a few that haven’t progressed past the Neanderthal stage! Best of luck in your quest.

@IslandGyal You never know, it might just jump up and and bite you when you least expect it!

2

I have conservative men reach out to me for some reason. It’s quite obvious if you read my posts that I’m liberal despite living in Texas. I don’t know if it’s laziness or just a random shot in the dark.
You’re a very attractive woman and they will just give it a try I imagine.

I imagine there is a strong element of visual judgemental activity going on for you. Blonde hair, green eyes being classic 'Aryan'. Thus you must really be one of them. Most people upon judging my photos assume I'm a hairy biker/hippy/pothead type. Motorbikes terrify me, I don't smoke, but I am a little hippish except for drugs...

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Girl you are not my type but seem like a lot of fun. I hope you find your dream guy soon.

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I guess in my mind, it depends on why they're contacting you. An example is I recently contacted another man even though he said he was only interested in women. I contacted him because I appreciated how he deescalated an argument while at the same time countering someone who was being a piece of crap, and I wanted to compliment him on his technique.

That said, it's very clear this isn't the type of message to which you're referring, so my guess is this: men (it's not always men, but it is all men) are cripplingly entitled and frankly lazy these days. It's especially true of white men, but I think it's true of all men. A lot of us seem to believe that facile compliments (for instance, what you might experience on the street) are unique and worth reciprocation, when in reality literally anyone can look at someone's ass and say if they think it's attractive. We tend not to understand that such a thing is the laziest thing we could do or say.

That leads me to believe these are the same men who probably didn't read your profile because they believe what they have to say is unique or interesting and don't have the ability to put in the effort of thought, and for that, I'm sorry. I know I can't really apologize on their behalf, but I'm apologizing that I took this long to come to the point. ☺️

Ammosexuals is an awesome word. Thank you for being on the site. I hope that you aren't discouraged by lazy jerks.

@IslandGyal Unicorns are definitely hard to find, especially in my world of polyamory, where it has a wildly different meaning. ? But any time you need to rant, feel free; happy to help.

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