10 reasons you should date me. #6 will blow your mind!

10. I met Bernie Sanders a long time ago. He was still called Bernard Sanders back then. I sat next to him on a plane and we had a two hour convo about the state of the country. It was probably the smartest I have ever felt.

11. I love animals. I saved a sick kitten from being attacked by dogs, and now that she is my cat she repays me by being a complete jerk on a daily basis. Typical cat.

12. I can cook. Have you ever been in that situation where you don't know what to have for dinner? Well now once you've decided, I might be able to cook it for you. As long as whatever you choose is pizza.

13. I'm tall so I can reach high up things for you. No longer will you have to carry around a step ladder to get to hard to reach places, you can just ask me!

14. I won't send you a dick pic. I know, I know. Mind. Blown. Right? Maybe I'm just old fashioned, but I figure if you can't get somebody else to take a picture of your dick for you, you probably shouldn't do it yourself.

15. I'm funny. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh!

16. I'm hyper-connected. You can reach me by phone call, or on reddit, kik, email, skype, text, or you could even just track me down in the street and say, Hello! I'm easily approachable. I used to have a carrier pigeon but he flew away with that one message I tried to send to Harry Potter.

17. I'm looking for an actual girlfriend. Recently moved to Jersey City from South Dakota. Work with mostly men. Need female companionship! Willing to fake being charming just for you!

18. I won't cheat on you. I'm an honest guy, I've been cheated on in the past and I would never cheat on you cause I know how that feels. Side note, I'm going bald young. It sucks. Even though I'm fit and have a good job, women tend not to give me a second glance. Be the one who does and I'll never give you a reason regret it.

19. I can count backwards from 10. So I expect you to be well educated too

Anyway, I'm 31 years old, 6"2, 175lbs and living in Jersey City. If you are a normal human female from Earth then I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon!
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