Ugg! I quit smoking for over two weeks and have now, freshly fallen OFF the nonsmoking turnup truck. Fuuuck!! And I thought for a second there, "My, my Ari, you Might actually have this beat this time!" Arg! So much for premature celebrations.
I am now at the crossroads where 1) I can say I f'ed up and smoked 6 cigs in the last 24 hours, decide once more to chalk it up to temporary insanity, give myself a free pass for the day and go back to Cig Sobriety or 2) I can say LIFE is F'ed up and promise myself to smoke 6 MORE cigs in the Next 24 hours and chalk quitting up, once again, to temporary insanity!
See... how easily I was just now able to manipulate myself into an excuse to continue smoking?? Such is the grand mind of the addict who wants to smoke another cig!! I can psychoanalyze my actions into the ground... and then come back again to reanalyze until I hit upon middle earth because I've run aground and Beeeyooond so fiercely! At least I can be honest about my shortcomings. Ode to the Silver Linings! chuckle
Self Depricating humour is my all time favorite, afterall.
I "thought" I was merely a social smoker... however, now it seems a good enough reason for me to smoke is because "I'm Chillin' and Socializing with Moi- Party O' One." I am socializing. ...With Myself, and for a lone wolf, who needs a 'pack' to Share 'My Pack' with, eh? hee hee hee!