A lot of us have been there, and you are never alone. Take care of yourself first , you may need your strength. I watched my mother go, and in the end her brain lost it power to regulate her body temprature, so that she spent the last weeks of her life in bed taking the blanket off, saying I am hot, and then pulling it back again, saying I am cold, fifty times an hour. But at least in her case it was mercifully quick, just a year or so.

@Fernapple thanks, I learned a lot with my first wife - she deteriorated mentally over nearly a decade from botched post op care from surgery. Learned who to take care of first to make sure everyone gets what they need the hard way.

We're on year 3 of him being really bad, but it's been a very slow decline for about 5 years previous. Much like slowely boiling a frog, mom's been adjusting without realizing how bad it is.

@1of5 Yes it must be very hard when it is very slow, mother only took about three years in all, though there were a few early signs. My wife died of cancer in my ealy forties, and fortunately that was also relatively quick, only three months, as did my father, so I will not have to face that with them. But I am sorry to say that my best friend and traveling companion, who is a lot older than me, shows signs that may be the beginings, hoping not, because she was such a vibrant person, it will seem doubly sad.

@Fernapple its hard to watch. You feel guilty wanting it to end, knowing the only way it does. It sucks. Watching someone who was once extrodinary at many things struggle just to get through a meal, or shopping, or even making a shopping list can break your heart.

These were people that individually and as a couple were recognized on a national level as educators - they still are on Jimmy and Roslyn Carter's Xmas card list - and then went on to work for charities (mom) and as a public servant (stepdad served as a port commissioner and city councilman).

Fortunately if you get the right people/information it's not as bad as it was. Lots and lots of things have been learned and while no cure exists actual quality of life living with it has improved. It's more manageable but fuck, I still wouldn't even wish it on Trump.