No, I did, it was well known to the girl I was dating. In my case we were mentally divorced, took 3 years to finalize, what with kids, assets and general unreasonableness.

No not at all, I was seperated for many years but not divorced when I began seeing people again.

i would have to say thats something the two of you need to discuss. for one, it could be used against you in a divorce. also, it really comes down to how the two of you feel about it. whats right for you. i can tell you if its wrong for me, but i know me. i know my morals and what would keep me up at night. i don't know you, you could date and be totally fine, or you could try it and feel terrible. it depends on you. and she could be fine with it, or it could break her heart. that depends on her.

Of course not, it's called choice. it's just a bit of paper. you can go have a gangbang if you want.