I think you would be very interested in the Atlantic article.

@JackPedigo Good article. I am again left with the thought, the ignornance of many people in America (and the world) as to the real history and back stories of the many regions around the continent.
Of course growing up just across the river from Philadelphia my lessons weighed heavily towards the events on the upper east coast. The Spanish settlements were not really well covered nor was Texas history.
The part about how people actually spoke was interesting. AS I have mentioned, my ex so was black and spoke perfect english. Before my racist mother was made aware of his "color" there were many times she would call to talk to me but I would be working and she would freely converse with Norm. 10, 15 minute conversations. Once she knew he was a black man she never spoke to him again. Clipped "may I speak to my daughter?" if he answered the phone.
I later discovered she felt we had tricked her, he should have spoke "black" so she would have known and not carried on a conversation with a black man.
Growing up with her and not knowing this side of her existed is weird to think about. Those thoughts and beliefs were not communicated to me. I sort of knew she did not like people of color but the depth of her hate was hidden. Which is a good thing, I really did not need any more reasons to dislike her.
The interesting this is Norm also spoke "black" english, there were friends who only spoke that way and I literally could not understand some of the conversations he would have with them.

@silverotter11 Did you notice the author?
Interesting and sad. A show I really liked (and taped) is called "Remember WENN." about a radio station in Pittsburgh just at the outbreak of war.There was one episode where a black mman filled in for a person in a romantic scene and became the talk of the city. An journalist was trying to interview him but the show people had to hide him lest the 'truth' be known. He was a janitor in the broadcast room and happened to be by the microphone when his part came. At one time they thought of a sort of Amos and Andy show and he did the Black English bit and his partner became embarrassed.
Being from Texas my dad and his family used some 'typical' names but they often hired African Americans for events and were always civil. Seems some just feel the need to follow the 'norm.' My grandmother had a black woman as a partner in her salad dressing business and didn't even tell my grandfather the recipe. She committed suicide and the partner was the only one with the recipe.
What heppened with your mother? Did she ever come round?

@JackPedigo No idea who the author was. The whole thing about white virsus everyone else is so over the top in some parts of the country still shocks me. My mom never came "around" and was most likely quite happy when she heard Norm and I had parted ways. She even made it a point to ask some years later if my current SO was white or black. She asked that question on the last day of a visit east, up until that point I was having a pretty nice visit with the family. Her pettiness spoiled the visit and I could not wait to get back to WA State.
It is an ingrained ugly tribal nature for some people and many people of color hate on whites just as hard.

@silverotter11 The author was Annette Gordon-Reed [hls.harvard.edu]

I think all racism can be reduced down to overt tribalism. The gay movement caught on when families and friends discovered a loved person was a part of that community. Affiliating with another from another tribe can and often does change people. But some of us are born without blinders. My best friend in HS was gay and, at that time and even now I could care less. This county is overtly white but most here will go overboard to welcome others from different tribes. I think being around a sea with influences from the others in the outside world can shape ones world view.

Sorry to hear about the mother issue. I am hearing that a lot and it saddens me that so many had to deal with toxic parents. Unfortunately, some turn out like their parents.

@JackPedigo I think you're correct about the influence of a port city, can't get away from the diversity.
We all have to just play the hand we're dealt some do it better than others. It truly was a relief to get away from the east coast and free to be myself without nagging criticism.

@silverotter11 With playing the hand we're dealt sometimes it helps to cheat a bit.

Yes, and Sally was his slave. However, the report said when his daughter from Sally was 21 he paid for her to leave. The information was sketchy on his son Beverly.

@JackPedigo oh ok. Thanks for that.