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Reasons to Remain Single

"Anyone who lives alone and manifests no longing to be in a relationship is – in our times – almost automatically (though more or less secretly) viewed as both pitiable and deeply troubled. It’s simply not thought possible to be at once alone and normal."

I've been single by choice for 8 years and have very much enjoyed it. I don't consider myself ill-suited for commitment. I just like being able to do my own thing.

These years of singleness have been a necessary season and the first time in my adult life that I've been in a situation where I'm not always having to think of someone else's needs and putting my own on the back burner.

Someday I may be in a committed relationship again, but it won't be because I'm lonely or succumbed to societal pressure. IMO, when people are looking for a partner for those reasons, they tend to make compatibility compromises they'll later regret.

If you're single, do you enjoy it? If so, why? If not, why?

VictoriaNotes 9 June 2
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40 comments (26 - 40)

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2

I don't have to share the remote control

2

I don't have a lot of trust in females after my divorce but have found that being single after 35 years just isn't that bad. No whining, no complaining, no spending all my money and no inlaws.

"no whining" "no complaining"...just by your attitude, which seems a bit knuckle dragging to me... I can see she had good reason to whine and complain

@VictoriaNotes I've dated a couple since, the last one told me she loved me after the first date which I found to be scary. I'm going to Alaska to visit my son in a month and my daughter in law says she has some Tlingit ladies in mind for me. All three of my surviving children have married out of their race so maybe I'll give it a shot.

@VictoriaNotes Thanks. This is my step son that I raised from the age of three and we are good friends, he has been there is 98. I know there are good women out there just taking it slow. My son has crab and shrimp pots so I should be eating good.

2

There are a many benefits to being single but I'll share this one.

Many years ago I started the rather arduous task of building a home theater. After much research, a common theme that was posted in designing and placing (big and ugly) speakers, bass traps, and sound absorbing panels was the required balance between beauty and function to maintain an acceptable WAF (Wife Acceptance Factor) While designing the first 14' black ceiling sound panel with embedded LED lights, I had an Ah-Ha moment. Wait! I don't have a WAF. I can transform this (what was a lovely) 24'x32' space to meet the acoustic needs without consulting anybody about aesthetics. The early phases of this project were not pretty and it is still unfinished. On the flip side, If I had a partner to work under, I may not have had to re-surface a lot of surfaces that were painted black or covered with black cloth with the significantly better black triple velvet.

2

I was married for 25 years. I'm separated now. One of the really nicest things I enjoy about being single is reading in bed at night, with some music playing too! On a different but related issue, what about the MGTOW guys who have renounced relationships with women? Between Incels and MGTOWs, it's becoming a strange world.

2

I see the logic in it, but emotionally I guess I'm nostalgic. Plus, jumping from relationship to relationship is rough on my psyche.

1

That was interesting

1

I have been divorced for 12 years. I have dated, had a live- in relationship for a years. I have been alone, not really dated now for about 5 years. I don't get out much to places I might meet someone. I have made some effort thru online dating with almost no results. I think it gets harder as you get older, to find someone with qualities, that you are really attracted to enough that you want to bring into your life full time. Ideally, at this point, it would be nice to find a wonderful woman that lived close by, had her own place, schedule of activities, interests & pastimes. Some one to share time together as it fit our routines. I am probably to picky and set in my ways, so this is unlikely.

1

I loved this video!!!! I love things that put language to what I really didn't think of. Numbers 3 and 4 were perfect!

I've been single for 10 years and I've spent most of that time feeling sorry for myself and terribly lonely. But I have gotten to the point of not accepting what I don't accept.

Anyway, thank you so much!!

1

Single is best. I am an artist, musician and sporty pescetarian. I would find it difficult to meet someone right. I don't smoke, or drink wine or spirits. I simply drink some beer. My house faces south. So, I have wonderful light throughout the day. Windows open all day. I know people that wouldn't like somethlngs I do. I don't want "work".

1

I can sleep like a starfish

Xena Level 6 June 10, 2018
1

Sometimes l do, sometimes l don't.

1

My ex-wife gets much more satisfaction from being single than being in a relationship, which I can understand, unfortunately don't feel the same way. Though I am learning to be single. Perhaps I would like a relationship at more of a distance, rather than a marriage.

@VictoriaNotes Yes, I can see that.

0

Oh!...I don't watch TV

0

Prefer to be single for so many reasons and it's not what most people think....I'm spiritual in tone to people. I can see to much in people most times...
I prefer after all this living that I have experienced to sit on the sidelines and cheer for those who happy and encourage who seeking the love, respect, and understanding that every living being deserve. I have graduated and arrived beyond so many peaks and plateaus....I'm grateful for my moments too that I had. I am feel good solo...playful and happy most times like a child but recluse and detached as a sage. Just passing through...

0

I've become so comfortable in my routine as a single person that I don't know how I feel about dating. Open to the idea but so far I just keep turning away great guys because I'm not ready.

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