I figure that we can have acquaintances and fill some of the void. Give of ourselves with caution?

Me too. Too many people conned me and abused my trust to the point of no return. It sucks because now I am the one that prevents relationships from getting off the ground.

I think the most difficult part of it for me is that I no longer trust my own judgment. Like you said trust is more of an idea than a reality though. Many people trust someone they should not and/or are suspicious of those that can be trusted.
For me, one of the worst aspects of being brutally betrayed was that I had no-one to talk to about it and ended up completely isolated. I am liking this site because I have people to talk to now and it is easier to see through the BS. I have weeded out numerous people because I do not like the way they speak to people and am following some people that have already been very helpful just by responding respectfully to me.

I totally get that. The hate is so bold and in your face now. It's like people are proud to be assholes. I don't know if you are familiar with the Standing Rock Sioux protest but the police brutally attacked Natives even though they were unarmed. Being any color other than white puts a person in jeopardy these days especially if they speak up for themselves. My brother is black and gets called the N word by complete strangers. It is so hostile these days and now we have a president that promotes the violence and hate. Our country is out of control. I hope you find solace here.

I agree. I'm pretty sure that most of my extended family voted for Trump, and it made me wonder who these people really WERE. I was naive; I thought things were getting better in this country, but apparently I just didn't know how much anger and hatred still existed in this country.

Yeah I seem to draw the worst of the crop. My 1st "BF" is now married to my first ex and I just found out my 2nd "BF" was telling my daughter lies about me to make herself look good. I guess I must still have some faith in humanity left since I am on this site trying to find people I can connect with.

@CreativelyMe Good to hear that. Scars never really heal they just scab over. I found I'm a bit too unique to fit in with most people. Not in a narcissistic way, I dislike and mistrust people with that quality. They are usually insecure behind their blind confidence. Take your time and do it on your own terms. Society has drifted into individualism and selfishness, the problem is those attributes isolate us. Consumerist society wants us to fill the gap in our life with buying things, which in the end leaves us with objects and little or no relationship to them.

@Alanb5 Thanks for the support. You make good points.

That’s advice I should follow! Several narcissists/toxic people have left me overly cynical and skeptical of everyone...I know I’m too defensive too.
Sigh, it’s an ongoing process.

I am 55 years old and have given too many people chances already. I appreciate your sentiments but the last 2 experiences have me shell shocked and in no hurry to trust again. I have not written people off per say but I definitely do not trust my judgment right now so I am here online hoping to make some authentic connections that might change my perspective but my track record is horrible and the betrayals have been severe not just let downs. My most recent attempt to socialize resulted in me having to report the BOD of the local youth center for embezzlement only to end up restricted from the property and ostracized by many members of the community so it is not at all as simple as taking a class and meeting new people.

@CreativelyMe Of course you are right, it's not that simple. But you have to start somewhere and that's what my suggestions were focused on. Joining a group or taking a class is an experience where you can control how much you let people in, and how much you are willing to share. I know that it's tough; I'm trying to talk myself into taking my own advice, and struggling to do so. I certainly didn't mean to disparage anyone's experiences, nor did I mean to say that doing this kind of stuff is easy or that it solves all problems. If it came across that way, I apologise.

@citronella Yes and no. It felt that way but I knew where your heart was. I do appreciate your support! Thank you.

@citronella I have been literally criminalized but a very people that go to hell I've had so many bitter experiences for helping people I guess I'm not the only one people are so perceptive especially religious people

I’m with you; I learned that people suck early with my narcissistic mother. And...too many continue to suck!

I am glad you at least have a trust worthy spouse. That is big. I have my cat now and my daughter but I don't think I will ever be able to trust anyone enough to let them get close enough to betray me. I sure do draw some underhanded people into my world that have left me feeling completely drained.

That is so true I think most people do suck especially the religious people you go get beer joint nobody's putting on airs but you go to a church you don't know who the Viper is