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Money seems to be one of the most fought over issues in a marriage, read that somewhere. A post I made in another group brought this to mind; I had made a statement “we help support our daughter, we don’t mind , we have plenty” made me think I sounded glib. We’re at a spot in our lives where we’re doing good, better financially than ever. BUT, it wasn’t so long ago we were close to being homeless. My husband was in school and I had filed for disability. Our son kept us caught up on rent and we got through it. ? Money has never meant that much to me, just a roof, food, maybe a meal out once in awhile. I give help because I’ve been helped. Rob is the same way, so it works. How are you on the future? Worried? I didn’t think this age would come this fast!

By Cherie447
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Clare Level 7 June 17, 2018

Worries me a shedload. I'm 50 this year and living in one of the most expensive parts of my country — rent alone is £875 a month, on a small 2-bed flat... I'm very aware that time is running out to keep the cash coming in. I work in an age-limited job (driving), I have no pension to speak of and I'm a long time off the housing ladder. What happens when I need to retire? Where does the money to keep paying our rent come from? Eeek!

I have a couple of schemes in mind: an unrealistic hope that I can bring in money from writing and the more probable earner of spending my dotage in a function band, playing Mustang Friggin' Sally for people's office Christmas parties. ? .... But shit, I'm gonna need something.

DaveMania Level 6 June 17, 2018

I never really cared about money, and I still basically don't.

I am starting to get more and more concerned, however, given the economy - I definitely believe things are going to get worse. Right now, I have a modest amount of savings (basically enough to pay the property taxes & insurance on my house for a few years), own a house with a small amount left to pay, and I have some retirement savings - not as much as I'm apparently supposed to, but it's better than what many of my friends have. Seems like most people I know don't have any savings at all...


I have been unlucky overall in love, for various reasons, but not concerning finances. All 3 (!) of my wives have seen eye to eye with me on finances, and all have been financially responsible and financially reasonable people -- even my first wife, despite having had mental health issues.

I got where I am professionally through hard work during a time when hard work still gave you reasonable hope of "getting somewhere". I started out rather hand to mouth. But the only real financial challenge was toward the end of my second marriage when my wife was dying and we were spending a lot of $$ on experimental treatments that insurance would not pay for. That happened during a dry spell right after the dot-com crash of 2000, too. But it was never a source of fighting. We hunkered down and got through it (or, well, obviously I did and my then-wife didn't). The only side effect is I'm to this day not where I'd like to be on retirement savings. But in this climate we're lucky to be thinking in terms of retiring at all.

If I were single and childless I would be content with a studio apartment and some bean bag chairs and a few changes of clothes. My wife is that way too. Money is not status to us. However we have adult children and grandchildren and we have spare bedrooms and an attractive home in an interesting location to cater to all that.

You are lucky that your son was both able and willing to help you out in a pinch. The two children each that my wife and I share, have all been challenged to keep their own heads above water; down the road a few years that might be different particularly for one of them, but increasingly, young people can't expect to participate in an upwardly-mobile middle class; it's being systematically gutted by our fearless leaders.

mordant Level 8 June 16, 2018

It's lifestyle that kills the fastest.


We have enough to live comfortably and do not worry. Our boys are fine, too as we put them through school.

Of course if the financial system collapses, we shall all be in the same boat.

We do have some silver and gold that we can use should the above event happen. However, if the economic system were to collapse, we would use the gold and silver to feed our neighbors for awhile.


Although I do not put much importance on money, most people would consider me rich. I worry little about my own financial future and I have universal healthcare and even the dumbass conservatives here aren't stupid enough to get rid of that, Oh Canada.

Similar here, but in 'Murica without the healthcare. Our healthcare is a cobbled-together mess.


A divorce lawyer once told me there were three primary causes for divorce - money , sex and in-laws .

Cast1es Level 8 June 16, 2018

Post divorce I had some struggles. I was unemployed for a while, and grossly underemployed and without benefits for a couple of years. (I sold Insurance, I am not a sales person) Some of the divorce details did not get taken care of properly, in fact took me 7 years to get it settled. Now that I've been continually employed for about 8 years and the details were settled, I'm in a good place. In fact, if health insurance wasn't an issue I think I'd consider taking early retirement.


I don't believe worrying helps anything, getting out of the problems and into the solutions,does...


Love over money!!

kunleyg89 Level 3 June 16, 2018
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