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People who say they care about you and then they don't follow up... I understand if people are busy, but if someone keeps saying I care about you and I'll be in touch and then they're not... Well, actions speak louder than words, so I'll believe it when I see it.

bleurowz 8 July 13
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12 comments

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1

Human nature. As a musician, I've found that it is far and away the exception when someone says: "I'll come and see you at the next gig" and they actually show up.

1

Actions are words....but you need to keep in mind that some people CANNOT deal with illness, just cannot.

Yeah, unfortunately. But this is in general, not just illness. Like someone who says, "I'll be in touch." Then you never hear from them, unless you reach out first. And it's consistent. Really says something.

1

People do care about you at the instant they utter the words, and then they turn their attention to someone or something else. It is a modern style of behavior, described well by Cole Porter in his song "Always True to You (In My Fashion)" from "Kiss Me Kate" [allmusicals.com]

3

Yeah. I was diagnosed with cancer shortly after my sister died and my mom abandoned me. I did 6 months of chemo and took care of a 10 year old with no help from anyone. I was really pretty hurt. That’s not true, my one friend George helped clean my house but I had to pay him in whiskey. Seriously though, I almost died and was hospitalized for days 3 times during chemo. Don’t you know, I drove myself to the hospital every time. Oh, and somewhere in there, I moved.

Glad you made it. That's impressive. Congratulations.

1

Fine by me..the less I see of most people, the better. Then they can't waste my time and energy on their dramas.

I'm perfectly happy when people say that, HOPING they don't mean it.

@irascible OH NO!
Actually, I don't care either way.
You don't even have a photo posted, so you could be a Martian for all I know. Say, are you a Martian? That would be cool.

2

Story of my life. They all say they want to keep in touch, but they all want me to do the connecting. I finally got tired of being the only one making an effort.

1

I've learned that when they say they will help, they will, as long as it doesn't involve their time or money. Especially when caring for elderly parents.

2

Integrity is a rare quality anymore. Sorry you got to experience it (or the lack thereof) first hand.

Sparks Level 3 July 13, 2018
1

I feel the same way. I've been around a lot of people that are good at lip service. Not so good at living up to their own words! Still hurts when I get my hopes up though....

1

Are you referring to the guy that you were seeing and then you guys transitioned to being friends with benefits and then one of you wasn’t sure if that’s what you wanted - or wait, one of you decided that you didn’t want that. Is this the same person who is now kind of evaporating from your life?

IF that is the case, my heart goes out to you. That is a tough row to hoe. If I may suggest, give a reading to a very short book called “He’s just not that into you.”

Rather than bringing you down, I believe it will make you feel better about yourself and put your mind in a place where you will be able to let go and cease communication for the betterment of your emotional health.

Take care.

It's about several people, actually. Realizing I'm tired of putting up with people who don't keep their word. I used to make excuses for keeping them in my life, trying to reach out, hoping they'll respond. I won't do that anymore.

2

You must be going through a tough situation right now. I remember you bringing up something similar to this a week ago. Sometimes you just have to accept some people for who they are: not trustworthy or dependable.

Yes, but this is also someone else. Actually a few other people. Realizing I'm tired of people who don't keep their word.

2

I've gotten really good at cutting people loose.
I don't play anymore.
If I can't count on you to keep your word, about anything, you're history.

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