Which would you choose?
So a master evil brainwashing terrorist, for the reasons of some unknown nefarious plot, intends on turning you into a religious, god-worshiping zealot, but was gracious enough to let you choose the religion and/or denomination. What would you choose?

You can't choose one of those Jesus-lite versions where you only show up to church on holidays. No, this evil mastermind will turn you into a true god-fearing, pamphlet wielding, blogging, kind of religions.

What do you choose and why?

I personally would probably choose some hippy-dippy new age version where I'd get to wear crystals, hand out flyers, talk about densities and vibrations, feel spirits, look for the Ascended Masters to arrive in spaceships, and give past life regression sessions. It at least seems more fun and guilt-free.