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So, because I'm in massive pain from throwing out my back, I did what anyone would do. Downed a fifth of whiskey.

Then I was laying in my mama's bed watching shaft with her and I fell out of bed. Dislocated and relocated a shoulder and just general ouchies. My neck hurtsssss.

But then I found it.

My dad, whom I've known 19 years, has been hiding it.

HE HAS A MUTHAFUCKIN SPEAR.

or...should I say, I do. Aha Haha its mine now.

LadyAlyxandrea 8 Dec 15
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7 comments

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0

Spear, leaping roundhouse kicks, your dangerous.

Only to myself it seems lol

1

You're armed now... I'm not messing with you... ?

0

Try weed instead of alcohol next time it might be a bit more therapeutic

It's illegal here and I like my job

@LadyAlyxandrea stupid Antiquated laws I would never want you to do anything that would jeopardize your career

@Drsmash253 trust me I've been actively pushing for legalization. Even my pain specialist recommended edibles

2

That looks awesome! I pity any would-be burglars.

2

That’s the spear it!

That was best thank you

groan

1

Nice Spear! Whatcha gonna do now? For like an encore?

Ok no encore. I'm good. Finding the spear was plenty - the photo was just gravy on top.

The story behind your Dad having a spear however? I'd love that sometime.

Me too lmao. Mom said she knew he had it under the bed but has never seen it or him use it. It was from his black belt training days apparently. I'm like "what the hell did he train at a monastary in china!?" Seriously blew my mind that he has a freaking spear under his bed. Though, and he doesnt know this yet, i have stolen it and it is now under MY bed haha I'm waiting to see how long he takes to notice.

Almost worth falling off the bed and destroying my body to find. How dare he keep this from me lmao

@LadyAlyxandrea I found a stash of bullets from "The War" in with my Dad's stuff in his tool cabinet in the cellar after he passed.

I did the mature thing and turned that ammo in at the police station because it was pretty old by than. I did not take a rock and see if I smashed them open if they would go "Boom".

However a Spear? That would be irresistible.

I might have to try something from a movie or two. "Highlander: Endgame" comes to mind. Donnie Yen's performance comes to mind. Minute 1:20 to start....


Disclaimer: this is not advice.

@RavenCT that is some amazing acting

@RavenCT I can already forsee how those tricks would end for me. At least the e.r. staff will get a laugh lmfao

0

Might not be as bad ass as the spear but this might more helpful (hmm, if I can figure out how to ad a photo to my comment)

There

I actually have a degenerative joint disease and they're also thinking either MS or ALS as well as a genetic disorder called ehlers-danlos syndrome which basically means my back is literally falling apart along with most of my body.

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