My divorced Mom and Dad both, caused allot of problems in my life. As an adult, I think if I had just kind of played stupid and just did not engage in any discussion or sharing of what was going on in my life it would have helped me allot more. But you just don’t expect to have to protect yourself from your parents when we are young and so vulnerable. The less they know the less they can use to manipulate. My brother and sister are not as emotional as me and more selfish (in this case is not a bad thing) so I don’t think it effected them as deeply as me. You just have to separate yourself from toxic, narcissistic people, it’s just not a healthy way to live. Find more people to be around that make you laugh and are fun and the toxic ones won’t drain you as much. My dad passed and it brought me and my brother allot of relief, my mom now has dementia and because she forgets short term she has become pleasant to talk and be with. It is giving me time that will allow me better memories now, which I am thankful for. A counselor can help you work out ways to deal and detach.