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Ten Signs You May Be Taking Your Atheism Too Seriously

1. When some one hears you sneeze and says “God bless you” your immediate response is “Well obviously he didn't that's why I sneezed!”
2. Some one at a PTA meeting or such like, that you are at suggests starting with a prayer and you are on your feet and have yelled “separation of church and state” before you can help yourself
3. You find yourself saying “Everyone else pays cash!” every time you read a $1 bill
4. You have your top fifteen atheist authors memorised in case anyone asks but cannot remember your pin code.
5. You can't get through the Christmas period without using the words, saturnalia, equinox or Mithras to one smart Alec or another.
6. You giggle when street preachers tell you Jesus is coming
7. You have 20 stomach turning bible quotes, chapter and verse memorised, ready for the next git who mentions “The Good Book”
8. You refer to the feeding of the 5000 as “The piece of Cod that passes all understanding” and you genuine think it is funny.
9. You know the actual meaning of the word Easter and like trying to get Christians to explain what eggs, chicks and bunnies have to do with a 2000 years dead Israeli Carpenter.
10. You know the date of The Census of Quirinius and the death of Herod the great and love pointing out they were ten years apart during your child's Nativity plays.

LenHazell53 9 Jan 7
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3 comments

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2

I hate to admit it, but I've even asked Jesus to "come inside of me." In my defense, he's adorable.

0

Erm number 9...Palestinian (probably) builder. Carpenter was a misunderstanding of the Ancient Greek...and its NOT funny 😉

0

Guilty on 6 (although I laugh on the inside).

That's disappointing. Here I thought I was taking it too seriously.

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