@Fernapple Another way I like to put it is that the world is full of people doing rather than being.

I regard my stepchildren as an illustration of this. I came into their lives when they were respectively a junior and senior in high school My own children exited the nest a decade earlier, and just missed the testing culture of "no child left behind", but my stepchildren were caught up in it. I was astounded at the narrowness of their daily existence -- go to school early in the morning, then to extracurriculars (important to have on your CV to get into the best colleges), then a hurried dinner with hardly a grunt of interaction with your parents, then hit the books until 1 or 2 am, often with the "assistance" of friends via text, Skype and social media, a too-short night of "sleep", rinse and repeat.

This, in microcosm, is the "life of quiet desperation" that many partake of throughout their adult lives, and they were getting an earlier start on it. I like to think I had some influence on calling them out of that rat race, especially my stepson, who has had to slow down and approach life more mindfully for the sake of his sanity. My stepdaughter, who I regularly grouse about in this space for other reasons, at least quit a lucrative but soul-crushing job in finance, and took a much lower paying but far more meaningful job. A horrific "waste" of her business acumen and training by the lights of her former associates at the first job, but it's that "waste" that she has built her personal meaning and purpose on, and I affirm her for that.