I am the opposite of suicidal. I have had a fabulous life and don't want it to end. But as I'm getting older I am distressed by the thought. I was hoping for some support to help me through this. My replies to my post have been more critical and negative than supportive. I was hoping to meet members in my area but have found none so far. I am new and will give it more time. I an agnostic secular humanist and have never identified with any religious or supernatural myths and never said that I did, but one member accused me of preferring to hold onto praising a heartless deity and scolded me for that. I was hurt and didn't understand it. I have no deity but only have a conflict with acceptance of having an afterlife.. I didn't say I believe in afterlife. I only said I would like to have it but could not believe in it. I received criticism for not using paragraphs. I did not know that was important and thought it was more important and considerate to conserve space. I will try to keep the suggestion in mind in the future.
Honestly that sounds great. If I were you or in your shoes I would try to enjoy that fabulous life rather than worry about the distant future. Although, I do not fear death so perhaps my advice is not the best. I think if you get too preoccupied with the end, you may start to miss out on the great times that will happen or are happening now. Too many could only be so lucky to be in your shoes, do not take it for granted please.
One day I was reading about the Dali Lama and someone had asked him if he was afraid of death, He stated that "I laughed" he said " Its like changing a pair of pants" he believes in reincarnation and since nobody really Knows for sure, we believe what we choose, besides after we die we won't know it. Like a Bogart movie "the big Sleep". Some folks, I used too, spend too much time and energy worrying about a natural event we can't change, but if Reincarnation is true then that it would explain why I like different things and for the life of me I don't know why. On You Tube there is a story about a child who as a baby would move his arms and legs in his crib frantically, It wasn't till he got old enough to talk that the mystery was solved. I don't know and don't pretend to know but It sure makes me think that "maybe".
Seems several questions. I’d use ‘around here’ as practice, or an opportunity to exchange the thoughts you’d like to share with a future partner.
I think getting older is harder on women; they’ve an internal clock ticking, and so much in our culture appears based on ..appearance. Hell, I can still reproduce, and I’m over sixty. That’s had me wondering lately ..how women my age handle the fact they can’t..?
Raised Atheist, one of my daughters confessed a near panic attack over the concept of eventual death. I remember fears of the same around her age, mid-twenties. What advice can one give, beyond the assurance that eventually you will have seen and experienced enough of life that you’ve almost ‘had enough.’ Keep experiencing, though
Paragraphs… Don’t worry about space, or margions around here Once battled a shitload of ultra-regressives online, one so dumb his posts were the equivalent of incoherent babble. So I cleaned one up! It almost made sense, too.. That shut him up, and down, for days. I kinda felt bad. So don’t leave yourself open to editing … someone might!
Don’t worry though about what others think of your thoughts, they’re yours. And, it generally says more of them than you. It’s weird to read some of the cutting pieces around here from those on a ‘dating site.’ Really? That’s the shit you want to be known for … the crap you’d like a potential mate to think you’re capable of..? Let them expose themselves, so to speak - so you can move on ~
One great fault we humans have is the inablity to think before we say things we shouldn't. I have always believed that how or whatever one believes is that if works for you then its right for you..
I'm grateful I've live long enough to realize I know but a little. Talking to someone whom believes different than I do is a treat, changing my mind on any subject is what stirs my intellect and keeps my mind open to new ideas we grow are we go. Life is filled with interesting twists and turns. I had an enjoyable conversation with a minister going door to door inviting folks to his Church, we ended up talking for 2 hours him knowing I was a atheist It wasn't a rowdy exchange we just talked and since I've been a reader since I was young I've learned a great deal about Religion, History dates and facts . Just because he was a believer I wasn't threatened, the only way two people can reach common ground is to share their opinions and if necessary agree to disagree. Never give Up.
Don't take it to heart. Forums are full of the best and the worst of us. If you have an opinion, hang in there and defend it. I think anything related to God gets a knee-jerk reaction from people still annoyed or upset at religion. The thing is, in this case, everlasting life can be discussed outside of belief in a god.
I also have a fabulous life, not to say I don't get depressed, but mostly I'm excited to me, in my own life, living it as I choose.
For me, I will have to relinquish my "afterlife" to the sum of people who were touched positively by my presence in their life. By "afterlife" I mean that I feel comforted now by the thought that when I am gone, they will hold my memory in their hearts, minds, and spirit for living, and maybe perpetuate some of my good qualities, in their own living, or learn from my mistakes and make better decisions in my honor. In this way I feel my life was worth something, helping in the process of social evolution in some tiny way.
Knowing that by setting a good example with my life, my chosen lifestyle and philosophy might live on within those I leave behind, and perpetuating even further than that into future generations, gives me comfort that my life was worth living.
If I can give something into this world (a book I want to finish which might affect the world in a positive way) then that would also be a living legacy that continues after my death. I have to work on whatever legacy I leave behind now, and that gives me comfort.
I said all that to say this: When I die, the judgment of my life will be determined by those I leave behind, who will either give me a warm loving soft place in their hearts, or will drop me into some imaginary dungeon with other demons that they consider a scourge on society.
So, every day I'm living toward being remembered well. Hopefully, I will live on in the smiles of those I leave behind when they think of me.
Adding correction to my post. I meant my conflict is a problem in accepting that there is NOT an afterlife.
We all will one day or night,come to the end of our time on this World, someone told me years ago "To be born,is to die", Fatalistic ? I suppose. Make good memories, as that about all we have, perhaps you had children? Some of us are not so lucky. The term "Legacy" is used a lot, a continuation of genetic line, traits, and behaviors that defined who you were.