I believe in ahimsa. you either consider it an a priori factor or you don't. don't look for middle ground. I could kill an intruder when I had a family to protect. Now, by myself, I'd probably be killed because I could never use deadly force. I didnt believe in ahimsa back then. You can justify it by supporting a family but make no mistake - you're acknowledging that human life and suffering isn't your top consideration. Make your decision and own it.

They are primarily a NASA contractor so don't worry NASA is nothing to be ashamed of they do great work if you want to completely stay away from the military it's literally impossible in high tech companies

There is nothing wrong with missiles and war gaming. Missiles don't kill people, people do. Enjoy your work!