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Uncomfortable Conversations with a Black Man. A must-watch for all white people. Silence = compliance.

Apunzelle 7 June 8
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This is really, really good. To go with it, one might read "White Fragility" by Robin DiAngelo. Read it. Sit with it and process for a good while. Then discuss.

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This video has a lot more useful dialog and information in it than the above tripe.

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And there is room in my heart and mind for this message too:

I am still deeply disturbed and annoyed by the white liberal bleeding heart "do-gooders" who mangle the message into "you don't understand my blacksplaining, so you are racist". I would like for those people to just shut up and lets hear the real messages!!

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Bull shit......The rioting criminals were in no way concerned with anything but themselves. The rioters were children with nothing to do. No political concerns at all.

There were many actual peaceful protests. But the MSM has reported on none of it.

The MSM is all about fear, click-bait.... This diatribe is ill-informed. He is all about victim-hood based in oppression. Bullshit.

70 % of black children are born to women on welfare. 4 generations of support and NO responsibility.

That is NOT because whities told them to spew children who have no future because they do not stay in school, and the community celebrates criminals over education.

So, I call bullshit. DO SOME RESEARCH.... DO NOT BELIEVE THIS BLAIMING. DO NOT ACCEPT ANY GUILT FOR SOMETHING YOU DID NOT DO!

@Jacar Wow, you just put your racist bullshit out there for all to see, without a care in the world. You can go on denying history and white people’s culpability for the fate of black people in this country. I won’t, nor will many millions of white Americans who finally see the black experience and perspective. If you don’t want to be part of the change, fine. But shut the hell up. I’ve heard enough of your racist prattle.

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I’m constantly astounded that this kind of stuff needs to be explained. Common sense is not that common.

@Indirect76 It is sad, indeed. 😔

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The place to start is NOT to assume the shit from the MSM is in any wary real:::: Gotta start with facts:::

How many people were killed by police last year? By race? By their depth of criminality?

How many black people were killed by whities? Tother way round?

How many interracial conflicts occurred last year? How many were instigated by each race, and ethnic group?

It is important to know REAL FACTS before supporting any position on any issue. Especially this one.

@Jacar Candace Owens is a right-ring shrill who hates her own race and gets her facts from Fox. I’m not listening to her selective presentation of (alternate) facts.

@Apunzelle So, you are saying because she disagrees with you, she's not Black enough for you?

@Normanbites Spewing more nonsense, I see. Take your pot shot ... you were still shot down for racist drivel.

@Apunzelle So that was a "Yes" then?

Pedal your "White guilt" all you want. I'm not buying any.

@Normanbites No, she's saying Candace Owens is a sold-out shill for the Alt-right. She uses right-wing talking points that are made up from whole cloth. (Like most right-wing talking points these days)

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I'm not sure where to start. A lot of ground was covered here. And the video did have a respectful tone, so as I explain my disagreements, I will try to do the same.

I'll start with the "N-word". If a word is deemed "hateful and/or disrespectful", it should not be used by ANYONE. Now I know he says that sounds like white people "Oppressing Blacks" yet again. So, I will point out that "Only Blacks can say it" is a form of "Oppressing Whites" by Blacks. So you resent the oppression your "race" has experienced, so you want to have MORE of it?? IMHO ... Oppression is oppression, hateful is hateful and disrespectful is disrespectful, no matter who is doing it. So just stop it already!!

OK on to the "history" of oppression and the resulting disadvantages. There are many ways to become disadvantaged and many "histories" to fill the back stories of how one happened to be born into a disadvantaged or disenfranchised situation. Most people who are disadvantaged were born into that situation through no fault of their own. Just like they were born into their skin color, by no choice of their own. The effect is the SAME no matter what color your skin is. I am in favor of programs to help people gain job skills and improve the circumstances for their lives, but I think it should be done based on whether or not they need the help. Not on their skin tone.

Police violence has been a problem PERIOD. Sure it is inflicted on some skin colors more than others. But I would posit that has more to do with perceived economic status as much as it is skin color. That excuses nothing. I am happy to see the advent of body and dash cams. I think it helps identify the crime perpetrators regardless of whether they are in front of or behind a badge or what color their skin is. Let's have more of that, police accountability for EVERYONE!!

On just one other issue I have comment, but it is not in total disagreement. I too do not condone violent rioting by anyone. Some of what he says sounds like justification for this violence. There is no way I will agree such things are justified in any way by anyone.

As for the other commentary of the difficultly of always being seen as a threat. I am a big ugly old white guy. The look of my face frightens small children. So I get it. I don't know what to tell you about that. I have to take measures to avoid frightening people unduly as well. All I can offer in that regard is people are people and everyone is different. What is on the outside is rarely a good indicator of what is on the inside.

Thank you for your video. As I consider your thoughts further. I hope you will consider mine.

@Seeker3CO Well said! All I could hear was this man white-splaining why black people shouldn’t be allowed to use the N word — along with his white interpretation of history and current events. If this video couldn’t open his mind, nothing I can say will.

@Seeker3CO

Well so much for trying to be understanding and respectful. Huh? I could ask you to do the same thing. Try harder to put yourself in shoes other than your own.

And again, I will point out that NO ONE is born into their skin by choice. NO ONE is born into their ancestral history by choice. NO ONE gets to choose their history. So instead of trying to find someone who is at fault via ancestry for our circumstances, why don't we all just put on our "big girl" panties and try to make a better world for all our sake and better lives for everyone.

I suppose if one wants to flounder around and "boo-hoo" about the mistreatment of their ancestors (even though you didn't get to pick yours and I didn't get to pick mine.) Then fine go ahead!! But I did not create their circumstances, I am not at fault for them and I can't fix them.

The best I can offer is to try to build a world where people who are born into a disadvantaged situation are offered opportunities and a hand up. I refuse to advocate limiting these opportunities only to disadvantaged people who happen to have a skin color YOU like.

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@Seeker3CO, @Apunzelle So what you are saying is it IS OK for Black people to "Oppress" white people's use of certain words, but it is NOT OK for White people to use those words nor to ask that NO ONE use disrespectful words?

So let me ask you something: In this American melting pot, just how white or black do you have to be to be able to use those words .... 10%? 20%? 30% how white is white and how black is black??

Are you getting how stupid that is yet?

No One should be using disrespectful words PERIOD!! It is the only sane way to deal with the issue.

@Normanbites Look, this is not a dialogue you can whitesplain your way into. White people have been the entitled race for long enough. It’s time for us to shut the hell up for ONCE and LISTEN. But you don’t want to listen. You just want to say how unfair things are for YOU. But guess what? They’ve been unfair for black pepper for centuries.

You clearly already have your mind made up. Fine. So do I. So you can go back and forth on this, but it’s wasted time and energy. The world is changing. You can change with it, or you can cling to your old racist beliefs and become obsolete with them.

@Apunzelle Do you understand the difference between a dialogue and a monologue??

Here let me "whitesplain" it to you ....

A monologue is where you yap your silly head off with out interruption and everyone else walks away when they are tired of hearing your crap.

A dialogue is when one person speaks and the other person listens. THEN the other person speaks and the first person listens. It is an exchange of ideas.

Get it? Probably not! It is a pretty advanced concept.

Apparently I mistook your monologue for a dialogue. EXCUSE the hell out of me!!

@Normanbites @Jacar Perhaps you should have a dialogue with someone who has actually had the experience of being black in America (and is not sold out to the alt-right like Candace Owens). Or even better, when they explain their experience to you (as in the videos above) you listen and don't assume that you know better than they do. The n-word has a different meaning in the black culture and is not disrespectful when used by them, between them. If you use it, it takes on a whole different meaning, no matter what you intend, because of history. Sometimes you just have to accept what a person says about their experience and sit with it without coming right back with your opinion. Ask yourself, "Why might he/she feel that way about this issue? Maybe I should learn more about his/her experience and history before I pass judgement according to my experience." It is time for white people to learn all of the painful things we've been avoiding and covering up for the last 400 years, so we can fix it. Racism is not a black problem - it's a white problem because we have the power in the relationship. We have to fix it.

Also, racism is not a sin. I'm a racist because I was raised in a culture that indoctrinated me to feel certain things and believe certain things. When I was 10 years old, my parents sold our house and we moved to a newer neighborhood. Do you know why? At the time all my parents said was that property values were about to go down and we had to move before that happened. Later I found out it was because a couple of black families had moved in. Of course, they were not wrong. Property values did go down, because everyone else was thinking the same thinking my parents did. Even if not one person moved out because they overtly disliked black people, because the white people controlled the property values, they had the power (as a group, not individually) to hurt the people who moved in. All the white people selling houses made the values go down. My parents are nice people and were kind of acting in self-defense. But by doing so they were participating in the racist system of oppression that is the reason black people have a much harder time getting ahead than white people.

So, while I can't flip a switch and change all of my deep-seated impressions and biases, I can try to be a little less racist each day through self-awareness and being sensitive to the cultural and historical context we live in and how it affects the minorities around me.

@MPendergraft If it is so important for ME to hear from a POC, why don't YOU STFU and let them speak?

And you can start by listening to Candice Owens ... she is black enough for you, isn't she?

@Normanbites Wow! I regularly listen to them. But I don't see any on this thread. And I have listened to Candace Owens. And partially because it's patently obvious and partially because I have listened to other POCs' reactions to what she says, I have reached the conclusion that I already expressed. Did you read more than my first sentence? Unless you have a thoughtful, respectful reaction to the rest, I won't be responding to you again.

@MPendergraft OH Yeah!! I read your first opinion on Candice Owens. Because she is actually a Person of Color and disagrees with your privileged all knowing white azz, SHE is an invalid black and you will validly speak for all Blacks who choose not to speak up themselves.

Yes, I heard you and that is what made me decide you are an idiot.

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White Silence = Violence

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