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Did you know that unicorns are mentioned nine times in the bible?

Karenl 5 Apr 25
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7

Then Noah has some explaining to do!

???
Darn right, he does❣
LOL

7

As Johnny Carson use to say " I did not know that". I have a question. Why is it called a unicorn instead of a unihorn? What does corn have to do with the fantasy? I've seen people with corns on their toes but a horse with a 8 inch pointy corn on it's head never.

In planting season Unicorns gather on the edge of the fields in moonlight, bending down their heads and poking little holes in the ground. Then the elves come and pop the little corn button in the hole the unicorn makes!!!

@Nickbeee
This is as much fun as Trump Piñata❣?

@Emme Oooh do you they we could surround him by unicorns in some strange ritualistic scene ! say it's a home movie for my Nan!!!!

@Nickbeee
Hahaha. Time to change the bong water bro?

@Markus You are cracking me up! i say whatever makes you happy, go for it. There were no unicorns in the evolutionary chain anywhere.

@Markus Hahaha!!! I think I must have drank it after reading this !! Didn't even smoke yesterday! must have been day before lol ... @BettyColeman what are you saying about unicorns not being real lol !!???????? me and you need to have words about your delusion lolol 😮 😉 😛

6

"Real unicorns existed, and they were terrifying" [ranker.com]

I would have to fact check that. You know why there is a King James version. Henry the 8th was Catholic as all of England then. The pope wouldn't give him annulment, and he wanted free to marry another. He couldn't keep beheading them or exiling them, so he had the Bible rewritten and the Anglican religion became the law of the land. No more Catholics, ha ha. The person who wrote the King James version was employed by Henry 8th. He used a Latin and Greek I think to translate, but no language translates exactly. Henry had a leg injured in a war. He would not allow him to take it off. He was fat. I think he had diabetes 2. Eventually that leg got to smelling so bad from going black over gangrene. It stank so awful and he liked his wives young. They did not know what was going to happen and the stench was overwhelming during sex. enough about Henry. I really don't care if you believe in unicorns. My attitude is whatever makes you happy,really makes me happy.

5

Talking snakes and donkey too, there's plenty of fuckery in a that book.

5

As was observed in "The Profit," a truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn. 😛

5

Yep, nine times.

  1. Numbers 23:22 “God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn.”
  2. Numbers 24:8 “God brought him forth out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn: he shall eat up the nations his enemies, and shall break their bones, and pierce them through with his arrows.”
  3. Job 39:9 “Will the unicorn be willing to serve thee, or abide by thy crib?”
  4. Job 39:10 "Canst thou bind the unicorn with his band in the furrow? or will he harrow the valleys after thee?”
  5. Psalms 29:6 “He maketh them also to skip like a calf; Lebanon and Sirion like a young unicorn.”
  6. Psalms 92:10 “But my horn shalt thou exalt like the horn of an unicorn: I shall be anointed with fresh oil.”
  7. Deuteronomy 33:17 “His glory is like the firstling of his bullock, and his horns are like the horns of unicorns: with them he shall push the people together to the ends of the earth: and they are the ten thousands of Ephraim, and they are the thousands of Manasseh.”
  8. Psalms 22:21 “Save me from the lion’s mouth: for thou hast heard me from the horns of the unicorns.”
  9. Isaiah 34:7 “And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness.”

Wow! Just wow!

Either bad translation or they were fasting. That John that wrote revelations went to an island alone. He fasted for like 2 or 3 months. It was months, He was high as hell. I had a girlfriend who fasted 3 weeks once. She woke up 9 months later in a mental institution. She ask the help what she did. They told her she sang alot.

I checked a Bible to see if this were true, and yes, it is. I am dumbfounded. I went to Catholic school for 12 years and never heard about the unicorns.

5

I didn't have a "jar of Glue" !!!!!

What were they up to ? Or was it more like, "Shit Jesus, I just saw a bloody Unicorn fly past" ...

"Don't be stupid Paul put down the wine".

5

I did not! Also dragons. I did hear about giants, and people living 800 + years, and "elohim", whatever they are.......

yes--dragons are mentioned 21 times in the old testament and then in Revelations several times. And of course David slew Goliath the giant with a rock and a sling shot

5

Dragons are mentioned as well; rather 'Grimm' of them, don't you think?

i think the dragons were in Revelations that John wrote while he fasted alone on an island for 3 months. He had a Natural high! He saw all kinds of weird stuff.

@BettyColeman true - but I live in the BAPTIST BIBLE BELT; and I've had revelations pushed down my throat since I was too young to remember.

It is part of the reason why I incorporated Preterists, and Revelations in my third novel.

It is really sick, when you really read it

4

Ecclesiastes 3 King James Version (KJV). don't call me a Christian. I am nothing you would know. So I accept no label except FreeThinker. Put that anywhere you want but do not hassle me with hatred. I could care less what anyone is or is not.

This is the Astrologer's Creed.

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:

2 A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

3 A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

5 A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

6 A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

7 A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

Did anyone else hear the song, "Turn! Turn! Turn!", while reading this? Lol

@Piece2YourPuzzle that is a good one! Or that song Dawning of Aquarius.

4

I always consider the multiple translations those pages have been thru when hearing something kinda odd like this.
But, yeah, given my choice of fairy tales, I'll take the unicorn over that book.

4

I keep saying it, it's always aliens.

Emme Level 7 Apr 25, 2018
4

Had no idea.

3

Now that is the only thing in the bible I wish was real. #teamunicorn

3

Did they mention elephants in the bible? Hmmm...

3

Unicorn meat is delicious!

3

Wow just wow how did I ever eat that n not ask wtf!

3

Well, it IS a work of fiction. Why wouldn't it?

3

The King James Version was written in 1611. Back then they thought unicorns lived in the Middle East.

2

Yip, the bible is a fantasy novel!!

Coldo Level 8 Apr 25, 2018
2

And the Land of Nod only once.

Isn't that where somebody made some women for Cane and Abel? lol.

Yup. They do have further explanation as to how, why, etc.
Adam & Eve lived hundreds of years, so of course they had other kids who populated other areas.
The incest was cool because their blood was pure though.
Fuckin people are insane.

2

You are shitting us!
[citation needed]

nope--it's for real--google it

I just looked this one up and it's there on the page.
Numbers 23:22 “God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn.”

1

A lot more than that in the Gaelic translation! 🙂

1

I am sure that it all made good stories after Christ died. ahem. Before people could write anything, they told the stories around the fire to amuse and entertain and teach their children. During the time they were handed down by mouth, I am sure each generation embellished them a little. Everyone should be thankful when they finally could write. The first language was an old Greek or Babylon and only about 2 people in the world can translate that at all. Then went to Greek and eventually to Latin, the language of Roman Empire.And the the eighth old man named Henry.

1

Prove it. Where?

google it or scroll down--there is a list towards the bottom---also dragons 21 times plus in revelations

@Karenl Googled it. Yup...you are correct, unicorns mentioned in the Bible.

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