Let's see the cash up front. I may be easy but I ain't cheap!

Horse walks into a bar,
bartender says;
"Why the long face.."

BaDaBoom!

Look into my eyes... you are getting sleepy. Now we're going to give you a sobriety test. Stand on one leg and beat your chest like Tarzan...

Okay, so I just tap danced....now....all you have to do is youtube ANYBODY tap dancing and know it was worse than that....you are welcome.

Binge-watch Star Wars?
Oh wait, that was yesterday.

I got nothing.

not sure this is entertainment, but you can entertain it if you like.

Bubble

Two years ago somewhere, they found a bubble forming nowhere in particular in the universe and nobody cared. Not many ever paid any attention to it, except a few physicists and a wall-eyed preacher on the local access television station somewhere in Arkansas. Of course, the physicists were giddy with wonder, but couldn’t make their math work. They didn’t publish. The preacher preached that this bubble was the the glob of uneaten jello salad from thirty-two years’ worth of fellowship dinners hosted by the Non-Denominational congregation across and just out of town. It was of course a sin to not finish every last dollop of jello salad prepared for a fellowship dinner. He proceeded to praise his own congregation for their faithful and steadfast consumption of the jello salads provided at each gathering they had observed. It was his favorite. The Non-Denominationalists nervously made posters and yard signs forgiving the preacher for his assertions, and suggesting that it was a bigger sin to have fellowship dinner leftovers involving Meringue. They knew he hated Meringue because earlier that summer at the county fair he had refused to fulfill his judging duties in the Meringue contest. No one really knew why. He just muttered something about calf-slobbers and left. So, a split decision resulted in three fights, forty-one broken jars of honorable mentions, ranging from preserves to pickled treasures, and two blue ribbons being awarded.
Four months later the physicists figured out the bubble was expanding, and its edge would reach earth during the Super Bowl half time show. Of course, they didn’t really understand how crowded it was going to be when space squished against the bubble, and warned not a soul. The halftime show was a disaster. Luckily, it was not the glob of jello salad feared by the non-denominationalists across and just out of town. For a while there it was tough. But in a couple of weeks, just as the preacher was finishing a last dollop, a small child wondered out loud if the bubble would pop like the gum his granny gave him. The physicists would have laughed longer had they not been so desperate for a solution. It worked sort of.
One physicist speculated that the empty bubble could be filled with some of the space outside it. He ran down to the local hardware store, bought a faucet and installed it on the bubble. When he turned the valve, it seemed nothing was happening. As he leaned down for a closer inspection, he heard a small whistle. It was his last experiment. Space swiftly began to fill the bubble. Many things, which occupy space, went with it, including the physicist, theater appreciation, Greenland, social media, everything made of that polyester fleece stuff, jai-alai, and the top third of a neighbor lady who was not of a very diminutive stature. At that point, the bubble just kind of sat there trying to decide what to do. After a while, it moved back toward nowhere in particular and let out a sigh. So now it’s in a wobbly orbit around a green recliner that was next in line at the faucet. The physicists are still struggling with the math but it appears the wobble is a result of the lower two-thirds of the neighbor lady still protruding from the faucet. Many grieved the loss of Greenland. Some folks lost all their friends when Facebook vanished, but had no one to post to about it. Otherwise, things seemed about the same as before.

"How bout a joke?
So there is this dude named Sid who is plagued with daily headaches. As the days pass Sid is about to just give up and end it all. You see, he as tried every known remedy including acupuncture to no avail. He decides to travel to a very expensive but well regarded specialist in LA. He believes that this will be his last attempt at finding a cure.
Many tests are run at the Doctors office and he returns in 2 days for the results. With great trepidation he asks the Doc what he has found. " I have good news and bad news" says the specialist. "The good news is that we can resolve the headaches. The bad news is we will need to remove your testicles to accomplish this." Sid tells the doctor that he needs some time to
to think about this and leaves the office with serious indecision. The following morning Sid wakes up with the worst headache he has had yet. At this point he realizes there is just one option if he wants to go on living. He calls the doctor and with a quavering voice tells him he will opt for the testicalectomy. The results are immediate and complete. Sid is left with a great relief but it is accompanied with a loss of self-esteem. To help lift his spirits he decides to buy his first suit made and tailored by the best known craftsman in town. He is astounded when the wizened old man with a tape measure around his neck stares at him for a few moments and says, "You wear a 42 long coat, a 36" x 34.5" trouser and a 16" neck with 34" sleeves" Sid stands there in astonishment. "How could you know that just by looking at me?" he asks. "I have been doing this for 50 years and have a perfect record for judging a mans size just by looking at him"
The fitting goes perfectly until the old man asks if he would like some briefs to go with the suit. Sid agrees and the Tailer says, "You wear a 37" brief". Sid takes some pleasure in telling the man he is wrong. "No I don't" says Sid, "I wear a 34" brief. I guess your perfect record is broken". A look of great concern comes over the old man's face as he says, " Do not wear 34" briefs. They are too tight and you may get severe headaches.

Yeah, I know kind of long but we didn't have anything to do anyway, I'm also in KY watching the rain fall.

Too bad about the rain, I spoke with my Mom in Louisville and it sounds like the rest of the week they got lucky for all the festivities.I don't have a TV and can't think of anywhere here that would have it on.I am a sucker for My Old Kentucky Home politically correct or not

It is lovely and sunny here. what sort of entertainment would you like?

Disappointment.

I'm trying to think of something entertaining to say, but when the pressure's on, it's tough...if I come up with something, I'll get back to you. It's rainy here, too.