I have lost alot of friends since I lost my husband. I really found out who my real friends were right off the bat. I am a straight forward person so I guess people do not want the truth I guess. I would rather be real then pretend to be something I am not. Since I have been doing alot of inner searching I realize its more important to be considerate of others and yourself. Alot of the times we loose ourselves trying to make other people happy. I just want to find someone who would accept me for me and not anything else. I know I am not perfect but would like to be happy.
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Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I am really sorry about your loss. If you ever want to talk write ok. I know what you are going thru
angelwings
Level 5
May 10, 2018
0
First grieve and take care of yourself then keep on moving, angelwings, you'll find your support network as you go. I was widowed (technically we were already divorced) 13 years ago. It was devastating and ultimately empowering though I admit for a long time it was just devastating. In time I found new strengths and independence and less reliance on others. Hang in there and come here for support as you need it. Hugs.
crazycurlz
Level 7
May 9, 2018
0
Even when casual relationships break up, for whatever reason , their friends will often side with one or the other. Depends on personalities that easily mesh - or not, history, how long they've known you, etc. So many variables !
Doesn't mean it's any fault of yours. Be who you are ! The ones that naturally gravitate to the person you are will be the ones who are most likely to remain - no matter what !
And try to remember - it is not our responsibility to make others happy . You can make yourself nutsy trying to please everyone ! We each need to work on our own happiness.
evergreen
Level 8
May 9, 2018
1
I agree with you 100%. Its just hard to loose friends who said they would be there for me and just disappeared.
@angelwings Yes , it can be. But to lose those kinds of "friends" may turn out to not be such a big loss after all - as they probably wouldn't be around when you most need them.
My mom and I were just discussing this. Mom was widowed this January and has already been subjected to insecure wives and the inevitable loss of friends. It's awful to see. I was widowed twelve years ago. Most of my friends dropped me, but I got new. It's an awful kick in the teeth when we are already down and hurt. Sorry this is happening to you.
Zster
Level 8
May 9, 2018
2
Thanks for your reply. It has been tough but I am learning alot about myself.
@1101 I am so sorry for your loss. I know some people can be fake, and only want things from others. I have never really wanted alot just to be happy. Its the little things that make me happy. If you want to talk feel free to write. Being reclusive can get lonely at times.
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