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This introvert decided to dance. In public. Sober.
It was about 8 years ago when I saw a local meetup group for a 5 Rhythms dance. I read that it is a form of Ecstatic Dance, which is free style, continuous dancing. There are no damn “steps” or moves , you just let your body lead the way. Perfect for me. Except that I was terrified. I stopped drinking in ‘98 because that shit almost killed me. Back when I drank, I would numb myself really well before I would attempt to dance. Without alcohol...how ? Fuck it, I thought, just go and stand in a corner and check it out. So I did. Thankfully it was dark. It was in a big old warehouse and they had decorated it with colorful soft lighting, for which I was grateful. I found a corner as I passed some blissed out happy hippies who actually smiled at me! I smiled back! Pretty soon I was swaying...swirling...dancing! This was a place I could feel safe from judgement (mostly- there’s always a few) , a place to jump out of my self imposed prison. I have gained a little confidence (not much, but some), ...enough so , that last week I had something wonderful happen. I was at the local Ecstatic Dance and made eye contact with a weird guy who was giving me a very judgemental expression... I mean it was so exaggerated!!.., I had to check my forehead to see if I had grown a horn or something! Ha! I just burst out laughing!! It felt so good to laugh at that face he was giving me! He had looked away by then, so I doubt he even knew how hard I was laughing. The thing is, just a few years ago, that judgy face would have sent me into a tailspin. For real. I have overcome a lot of trauma, still working on it, forever and always, but I do believe that I have made some progress. I am still laughing!!

DeeWoman 7 June 4
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8 comments

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3

So impressed with how brave you are. 👍

Thank you. I just feel the need to challenge myself now and then! Vibrant Life exists outside our comfort zones. ✌??

3

Keep on truckin'! ☺

I’m old enough to dig that ,man! ✌??

@DeeWoman ?

2

Congratulations! Hope you're able to continue down this road.

Thank you!

2

WOW. Really a powerful message. I live in Vancouver, BC where every Saturday there is a similar dance. Low lights, world music, no alcohol or drugs and dance the way the spirit moves you. I love it, I did ballroom dance before but love the freedom to just go with your own beat and feel of the moment. I can completely relate to your experience.

nice! it is the best therapy for me! we are encouraged to bring our emotions out through our bodies. I have been able to release so much pain, express so much joy, or just be fully present. Really amazing stuff. 🙂

2

Brilliant! It’s scary out there for anyone with social anxieties or self-doubt. I count myself among them. So, SO happy to hear of your breakthrough! Keep movin’ sister!

Jumbo Level 4 June 4, 2018

aw, thank you kind sir! 🙂

3

Keep doing what you are doing. It will only get better.

1

glad you survived and are overcoming the echoes of damnation.... dancing frees our bodies to be... any jerk that does not appreciate your freedom and beauty deserves all the ridicule decent people can muster to him

2

Dance sober in public? What was that introvert thinking?

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