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Would you remain friends?

How do the results make you feel? In a recent post I posed this question and included a poll.

"If you had a nonreligious close friend who decided to become a believer and practice their faith would you remain a close friend?"

Below are the results:

61 Voted as of 6/14/18 7:58am CST
47 said they would remain close friends
14 said they would not remain close friends

How do the results make you feel?

This was a very tough "yes" or "no" question and there were plenty of valuable caveats in the comments. [agnostic.com] was fun and very insightful. I hope you enjoyed it too. Thanks everyone!

  • 8 votes
  • 0 votes
  • 16 votes
CreativeTN 5 June 14
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10 comments

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1

Thank god I've never had a close friend fall like this!

Considering I have a few Xtian friends who have deigned to continue associating with me once I became an infidel, it would entirely depend on my friend's ability to be my friend and not try to save my eternal soles.

1

I can't honestly answer that one. To me it would depend greatly on if they can do so respectfully or not. Most people who start something new get obsessed so their will likely be a downswing for a while. That isn't unusual in the span of friendships anyway as friends do sometimes disagree, work though the weirdness and figure out how to get around it if they make the friendship more important than the differences.

If it doesn't pass and the friend is obnoxious about it then probably not... which would be a shame.

If it does pass then fantastic.

I almost clicked indifferent but neither outcome seems to be something I'm all that indifferent to. I tend to consider carefully who I let into my life and how deeply. If I consider someone a friend then I likely consider them a good quality addition to my life. I prefer very little drama and serious mutual support necessary... not that I need a lot of support myself either but when I do I expect the return because I tend to be that person who is there when needed.

AmyLF Level 7 June 19, 2018

Great comments... thanks for sharing.

@CreativeTN Thank you very much. I guess what it all breaks down to is that it really isn't the difference in beliefs that are such an issue, but if people decide to be an ass about it. There will always be those differences and I think this world will end up much more lonely and cruel than it already is if we don't figure out how to accept that and move on. No agreements necessary, just accept it and move on.

0

No one felt bad about the result. 35% felt good and 65% indifferent. For most, this possible inference might be made. While most would try to maintain a relationship the result of that effort wouldn't be a huge concern. This was fun. Thanks for voting. 🙂

0

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Ryksie Level 6 June 14, 2018

,

1

I have a very longtime friend who lost his way. i told him it was bullshit. And we never talked about it again. He is not as as he was. But, he is was taught the shit young, sorta didn't care, and then got sucked down the hole to an extreme for a while.
we still share a profoundly bent sense of humor. Even about religious shit.

JacarC Level 8 June 14, 2018
1

Doesn't bother me. What people want to believe is their choice and a very personal choice I might add. Like whether they like Coke or Pepsi...pepsi drinkers are wrong but it hurts no one 😉

Besides might have a VERY limited circle of friends if you shun all those that do not believe what you believe...also a really prejudicial stance. Most people believe in one god or another and I know it has little bearing on my relationships from my perspective

3

I am glad people felt like they could remain friends despite the fact someone chose a different path. If someone makes an informed choice to believe or not believe, then I have to have respect for that. We won't all see things the same way.

Ditto... well said!

I also agree with others when they comment about the nature of the relationship. It would be hard be around anyone that continually pushed their belief system on me... no matter the belief. I am a musician but I don't want to talk music all day, right?

@CreativeTN You are right - if they were trying to say they had seen the light and I should too, then that would be more difficult. It would be preferable if the respect was mutual.

2

I'm glad the number of people that would not remain friends was low. As people of reason, we need to be able to use reason, and it's unreasonable to run away from people who think differently than we do. There are ideological issues that may dampen that friendship, but that wasn't part of the question, so some are saying that for no other reason than a difference in ideology they would 'divorce' their good friend.

I agree. I find that most free thinkers are of above average intelligence and have a disdain for prejudice so it stands to reason our community would refrain from judging others for there belief system. In doing so I think if we had a close friend we should make every effort to maintain the relationship even if the dynamic of the relationship changes. I'm a middle of the roader on most issues, hence agnostic and not atheist. I say this to say, I have friends that are far left and that are fairly far right but I manage to here their issues, debate them occasionally then set it aside. They are all good people finding their best path. It isn't possible for us to all agree. Even if we all agreed on religion or lack there of, we would still disagree on other issues. We just have to learn how to play together... think, share and appreciate.

1

I can be friends with theists. Although I will say that my best friend from high school and college eventually grew more religious and I moved further away until I became an atheist and while we are still friends, we rarely ever talk and most of our interactions are on Facebook.

1

For me life narrows down to; you do you, I do me and let's strive to do or cause no harm.

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