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What is your darkest, most difficult experience?

What struggle in your life was so dark, so difficult and so unimaginably painful that you don't think other people could begin to relate to or survive if it happened to them?

ScienceBiker 8 Jan 6
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46 comments (26 - 46)

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5

Very daring question.... and a long story for me if I try to tell mine, but I will try ....sexually abused as a little girl,as a teen, abused again as a young girl, punched,I lived trough refugee camp with three small children, lost my mother during the war, lack of diabetic shots,or inability to store them properly, she injected herself incorrectly, she died right at my age now.....emotionally,verbally abused by my ex for twenty years......still standing strong!
But the worse blow was April 2017 when my college graduated son lost his mind....literally...attacked me,injured my shoulder and end up in the mental hospital. Bipolar, manic...that is what they said.We did not fight, argue sometimes, but it was not personal.I thought we had a good relationship. He was dealing with his identity as a queer person,which I knew and accept,.....But after the incident I could not face him for a long time, but when I realize what will do to his mind if I neglect him!!!!!,I had to.... I will do even more damage for his future!!!!!!!....I swallow all the fear and pain of being afraid of my own child and meat with him. That was the hardest thing to do, more painful than giving birth to him.....I helped him pull up from the deepest darkest bottom that one can be found.....With help of my friends,we start meeting once a week.Second time was much easier and now he is doing ok with therapy and pills. He is living on his own and looking for a job.
I was dealing with my own mind Ayurveda way, meditation,yoga.... with out pills and I secede!!!!
Still standing strong!
On my own!!!!
I love my life again

3

Separation/Divorce
Would not wish it on my worst enemy... well... may be my worst... lol

About to go through this myself.

@ronnie40356 message me I can send links to help through this.

I don't mind the divorce so much. We've been married 31 yrs and I suppose are both kind of tired and bored with each other. We both still work and i'm keeping the house w/mortgage so there's going to be a financial hit. I worry about that but we do what we must.

@ronnie40356 I understand, 20 years together, 16 married, i refi'd house as well. It is what it is, there is no time machine, it's not fair to you all phrases my wife used.
Feel free to contact me if you need to talk.

3

The past few years of my life. It's a long story.

3

I don’t think I’d want to share that on a forum. Let’s just say parts of my life were pretty dark.

3

Making a mistake, saying something that turns out to not be true or as has happened, leaving out a big part of it and therefore giving a false picture

2

In October of 2013 my 20yo daughter suicided. I lost my mom and dad to natural causes years before that but that grief was no comparison. It was like the world turned a dark twilight and I'd entered some other strange different world. Terrible time. Still miss her badly these four years later. That would be my #1 of dark, difficult times.

2

Mental health... the fall into darkness took place over many years and it's taking a long time to crawl back out... to get the light to shine brighter. Some days it shines and some days I can't find it or it's dimmer. Depression, anxiety... insidious beasts...

Not to pry, but have you tried any of the various chemical cures?

agreed @ScienceBiker. There are no cures-all you can do is manage the symptoms. I have an antidepressant, which does help keep me more centered (less emotional) but the rest of the symptoms you have to find other ways to manage. And once you crawl out of the deep dark well, you still have to manage things. I've had two major falls into the well during my adult life, this last one being the worst and most long lasting. Pills only do so much-and that's if you have the right pill for your physiology...

2

I had a child hood that no-one could begin to understand, I read similar stories occasionally in the press, and some are actually worse. but unless it has been your reality, ongoing, for well over a decade, no reprieve, no respite, just ongoing and knowing nothing else, you just can't begin to imagine.

2

losing my 8 year old German Shepard . she was a loving and intelligent dog. lost her so suddenly after a day and half she was sick. hate my life for extended period.

Ewket Level 4 Jan 6, 2018
2

The darkest, most difficult experience is The Death Of My Grandmother. My Grandmother Was A Very Good Lady And A Best Friend To Me. She Passed Away In 2011 At The Age Of 71.

2

Drug addiction, Alcohol to be exact.

2

Life

@ScienceBiker fyi I have a dog and two cats lol. And I like my I class so far😉 although I wouldn't say no to SFC capacity! I do want an orbitrap mass spec also heehee. I can take that in place of a Harley

2

A trip to Wal-Mart.

LOL!

2

I am so sorry hon . Hugs to u.

1

Childhood abuse and neglect. Foster care. Court testifying against a parent as a child. Sibling separation. Overcoming addiction. Let's just say there has never been a God present in my life. Strength comes from within ourselves. We have to be our own hero.

@ScienceBiker I am sorry to hear that, by the way. I was trying to be kinda tame and not over share while still retaining some honesty there. Some of us don't even get a chance to be deluded with the idea of a father figure in the sky watching out for us, huh?

@ScienceBiker that would be fun. Until several beers in when we are both crying and decide to make a suicide pact! I hate it here, though. I am going to go live in the woods one day.

@ScienceBiker I would rather take my chances out there than in this shallow existence most days.

@ScienceBiker And I hope the suicide thing was not offensive. I just have a fucked up sense of humor where I joke about all the darkness in my life. My favorite uncle killed his wife and then killed himself, so I certainly am not trying to come across as insensitive to anyone who has dealt with suicide. Truly.

1

It is the same thing that also awoke my atheism. A few yaers back i was stabbed and as i was on the operating table i had a heart failure nd died. I think for like 8 mins. But as i was losing blood before i got there the world was just quiet. I was super aware of everything but just couldnt move. There was no light. No choir of angels. No pearly gates. No voice of gid. Not even a vision of hellfire or satan. Just silence and a cold feeling that seeped into my very bones. Once i woke up from surgery and healed enough to leave the warm sun on my face was so utterly exhilarating and made me so thankful to be alive that i strove to know more about how the universe works.

1

Molest means just that. It happen to anyone. Girls or guys. Enough said.

0

Hands down, when my son passed away...no experience can ever prepare a parent for such a devastating loss...the shock eventually goes away but the pain is ever-present even after 10 years...maybe im still bitter but I do NOT believe everything happens for a reaaon

0

I think anybody can survive anything if they really want to. But the pain one might feel is different from the pain someone else might feel. I haven't had anything truly devastating happen to me that other's haven't been through... But if my biological mother told her your story, you might not have been able to at all relate or even want to survive. It's sad.

0

Confronting the memories of my own stupidity

0

Nice try NSA! No way I'm sharing that.....just ammo for the re-education camps lol

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