Agnostic.com

10 2

How do you if a girl likes you or if she just being nice to you? How can you tell the difference?

The other day this cute girl and me got talking. She laughed at all my jokes and stuff. Even the dumb ones but her body language was a bit cold. I initially started the conversation a few times and it was flowing naturally. she was close to my type. Either way it's bit werid if you directly hit on a lifeguard whilst swimming. I didn't use a pick up line to hard her just said hi. I would have drown just so she could haved saved me but honestly I can't even do that even if I tried..

????

M121 7 Jan 16

Post a comment Reply Add Photo

Enjoy being online again!

Welcome to the community of good people who base their values on evidence and appreciate civil discourse - the social network you will enjoy.

Create your free account

10 comments

Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.

0

Magic. You need magical powers to understand social cues.

As an aside: Just because they are attracted to you, doesn't mean they want to date.

0

It doesnt sound like you know each other very well

0

Body language is important, maybe you should have asked what she is doing later.

1

That is one of the great mysteries of all time.

@M121 I know about 80% of the physiological cues one of theses days they might actually apply.

2

Interested women will commonly (not always)
-touch/play with their hair
-touch you (even grooming like removing lint or smoothing wrinkle)
-lean or move in closer
-mirror your posture, gestures, movements
-stimulate conversation, e.g. with questions

Disinterested women will commonly
-avoid touching you
-cross arms or otherwise "close" themselves off
-keep or increase distance
-turn away
-avoid eye contact, look away
-avoid stimulating conversation

It can get confusing when someone is not interested but doesn't want to be rude and so listens and responds to you attentively out of politeness. Watch for wrinkles around the eyes (true smile), direction of gaze, posture/movements of the body.

@M121 You have to discriminate carefully because sometimes people smile when they are nervous. There's science and art to interpreting this stuff. It's rarely simple; everyone's different, the same signals can mean different things, and there are usually multiple factors to weigh against one another. If you're not sure, you can always ask. Starting with "I'm sorry, but..." or "I don't mean to offend you, but..." is a safe bet. Most women would not be turned off by manners and consideration like that--and if they are, they're probably nothing you want to mess with. Connecting with people at their place of work is always dicey. She may be interested but unwilling or unable to act on it if she's at work, OR she may be uninterested but trying to keep things nice and friendly because she's an employee and you're a customer. She might think you're cute and be responding to that unconsciously but have a boyfriend and no intentions of cheating. Or think you're cute and out of her league and is nervous about embarrassing herself. She may think you're cute and funny but have no interest in connecting with you for some other reason.

Honestly I recommend leaving women at work alone, unless she's the one throwing off unquestionable signals. If she's working and you're unclear on the signals, I'd say leave it alone.

2

Great question! I try not to speak for anyone but myself (haha) .. but I’m aware that us humans have pretty predictable behavior, so here goes.. I’d say the only way to really KNOW is to ask, I’m very friendly and it gets mistaken for interest or flirting from time to time. In my experience, being nice and friendly and flirting get blurred quite a bit, so generally speaking, I’d suggest you ask, but do it in a way that’s friendly in if itself. So, for example if you are not sure about the vibe, an invite to coffee, or an offer of your number for a specific purpose, like oh I like “blah blah” as well , it would be great to talk to you about in depth when we have more time.. etc ... that way the female can either agree , which shows interest in you, or otherwise it gives her a way to decline without making it awkward.

1

Explain what you mean by her body language was a bit cold? Body language speaks volumes.

2

A woman's smile,body language, and attention span are good signs. If I like someone I'll say "I really enjoyed our conversation." It's a hint to ask me out.

1

Excellent question if I knew the answer I would be happily married right now

2

You ask after looking at her finger. But even if you don't look at the finger you ask.

@M121 I was going to say if you need to ask what to ask... You are not ready but you look ready so... you can ask... She wants to have something more intimate with you or can she practice her CPR with you or you will like to be consenting with her. Get creative if you must but... Just don't take it out as a young filipino sailor did in a Finland bar and next day all brown skinned sailors under 5'8" were in a lineup with the zipper up mind you. The desperate soul was found and spent 2 months restricted to the boat. with extra duty daily but sunday.

Write Comment
You can include a link to this post in your posts and comments by including the text q:15700
Agnostic does not evaluate or guarantee the accuracy of any content. Read full disclaimer.