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So. Its hard having to move back home after leaving a toxic relationship, its hard to do that with two kids and having to start all over. From finding a job to worrying how are you going to get to that job. Stress is a killer they say. And the way my heart is I believe it. In trying not to stress but between staying with different family members helping take care of your sisters kids and find a job. In trying to take it a day at a time but last night and this morning. In having a had time. My ex wants to pay for stuff for himself but can't seem to offer to buy diapers. My sister who I watch kids for and live for went off on me saying I have had a poor attitude every morning and I need to have more sympathy for the kids and trying to say I lost her kids bottles. But I don't use her bottles I breast feed. And I admit she did have more bottles but I don't know where they went. And its a struggle to get my two kids asleep and for them to stay asleep every night so I admit I do have a poor aditued due to stress and lack of sleep. But. I just. I just wonder if it would have been easier to have stayed with my ex and constentlu get lied to and cheated on. And have is over controlling family tell me how I should raise my kids and have my house among other things. In sorry. I'm just having a very very low day. And I don't have anyone to talk to about what's going on because every time I do its your being dramatic stop being so sensitive. ... Idk

Jswearingen92 5 Jan 17
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11 comments

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1

Remember what it says on the cover of 'The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy' - "Don't Panic!"

Lmao 42 is the awnser lol

1

You know I read this and wow. I have had to deal with this kind of shit for years. So, I totally understand where you are coming from. Can't seem to get ahead and when you think you do the rug gets pulled out from underneath your feet. Its not worth staying in a toxic relationship. Its created some things In me that I do not like and have to unlearn. The problem is we are surrounded by unsympathetic human beings who have not empathy whatsoever. Let alone listening to in-laws or family say you need to turn to jesus. Its nauseating. Just take one day and one hour at a time as you must.

1

Being a single mother is very challenging. Stay strong, rebuild, and keep moving forward!

0

I left my abusive ex. He was gaslighting me. It was hard. Why can't your sister be a parent and watch her own kids? I'm just curious is all. I'm not trying to be rude or anything. Being a single mom would be frustrating. I just don't see why women have kids at all if they can't take care of them? (E.g. Your sister) I know I can't be a good parent to children, that is why I don't have any kids. I can hardly take care of myself most days. The littlest things aggrivate me. Kids would not be a good idea for me. I was put into foster care for 6 months. My parents couldn't take care of me.

She works and goes to school. So I try to help her out with that but now she has a new guy and he is a good guy so far I have no issues with him. But I just wish she wouldn't ask me to watch them for date night. I watch them morning and afternoon, nights for her five days a week. I did have my own place and a job but shit happened ska my ex and now I'm rooming with my sister and her kids in our mothers old house.

Why can't her man watch them? Why such a heavy load on you? Daycare is available.

1

Wow! That would be a lot to handle for anyone.

I am 100% certain that you are better off without your ex.

There are resources available to help you. Dialing 211 is a good place to start.

[211.org]

Good luck!

0

You find a way. My kids mom has schizophrenia and child protective services took them away at birth. I was helpless because she refused to put my name on the birth certificates (twins) Had to go though oodles of red tape and physiological evals, DNA testing, fingerprints , background checks, parenting class. My kids were in foster care for the first 3 months of their life. The foster family was not allowed to make medical decisions for the kids. They for whatever reason had them on soy milk neither one of them could have a bowel movement. I had to just about beg the doctor to listen to me to have them put on dairy based formula. The regular forster family had gone on vaccination the stand ins let my infants get sunburn while they were at some sort of sporting event. The judge in the case showed some mercey in the 3rd month gave me sole custody with the provision that the mother had a protection from abuse put on her with a 1000 yard no contact. Lots more b.s. that my family caused us. I was able to buy a home far away from that situation. We have a great life out here in the country, my kids are going on 7 years old. It took a lot of heartache been away from my family over a year now, not once has a single sole put any one of us down

1

no, it isn't better. this will be just a chapter in your life so don't worry.

1

You have a lot on your plate, and I can totally understand - I've been right where you are now. My kids mom left us (after her third affair) right before my disabled son turned 4, so the kids and I moved back to Mobile (my home town) from Vermont, and moved in with my mom til I could find a job, place, etc... Everyone had two criticisms for any one helpful thought. Add to it their inability to deal with a mentally disabled eternal child, and the poor job market at the time, I was tempted to kill what little savings I had and put us up in a motel just to get away from the 'help' offered by family.
Please don't apologize for reaching out, or for having a low day. There are many good people on this site, many of us who have stood right where you are now, and we've gotten through to the other side of it. You will too - I promise.

Always here if I can help.

2

You're definitely better off without your ex. Things may be rough now, but they can better - if you'd stayed with someone like that, they never would have done and in all likelihood would have got worse.

All the best for the future.

Jnei Level 8 Jan 17, 2018
2

@Jswearingen92 you have friends here. My physically handicapped daughter was 8 when I left my husband. I had been a full-time sales representative for Brach's Candy and was on the road in sales. It wasn't easy making this move. Who would want to date a mother of a handicapped kid? Is there anywhere else you can go? Finding a roommate would be less toxic than your judgemental family. My family was angry with me for leaving too and insisted it was my fault my ex almost choked me to death. You need to be in a more supportive environment. Maybe get some help from a women's group. See what you have for resources and seek them out.

2

Keep calm. Be strong. Your kids need you to be strong. Try not waste your sleep on it.

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