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Would you stand over a storm drain handling expensive jewelry?

Of course the man dropped the wedding ring down the storm drain. A little thinking would have prevented this mishap. Look around. Choose a safe place.

Miraculously, police found the ring and cleaned it. Now they are looking for the couple.

"Run!" I think to the woman. This reminds me of my former marriage.

My first date with Terry was a microcosm of our marriage. Backpacking to Domke Lake, I put our food in a large, zip lock bag. This went into a plastic bag with a string closure for hanging the food high in a tree: bear-proof. But not raccoon-proof, I learned five years later.

Arriving at the lake, Terry loosely tied the food bag to a floating log. He often did things haphazardly.

"Look! The food is floating away in the lake!"

Terry was afraid to walk the floating log. He couldn't swim. I ran into the woods, found and stripped a long pole and walked the log, using the pole for balance. With the pole, I reached out and snagged the string, pulling the bag toward me.

I had mentally planned these steps in a flash when I saw the problem. Selected a pole long enough to reach the floating bag. The bag floated because I had carefully sealed it in a zip lock bag, as is my habit.

My rescuing Terry became an irritating and exhausting pattern in our marriage.

But I was starry-eyed in the first flush of attraction. That summer, I taught Terry to swim.

[huffingtonpost.com]

LiterateHiker 9 Dec 2
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12 comments

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1

Look at you, Ninja Skillz! 🙂

1

Nope

2

This is a great story about camping in the wilderness. But what struck me were the early signs of trouble with Terry. I was too young and inexperienced to see the the trouble that was ahead of me in my marriage. The problems appeared even when we were dating in college. At least Terry is now your 'X'.

@ADKSparky

Thank you.

1

@santocoyote

Thanks!

2

You were able to come up with a workable plan without risking a dip in the freezing water,concepts foreign to your (then spouse).

2

I was a boy scout. The motto is "Be Prepared". I still drive people nuts planning for shit that will probably never happen.

Duke Level 8 Dec 2, 2018

That's why I'm a safety mentor where I work. LOL

@Duke

Terry called himself "Mr. Spontaneous."

When Terry brought home a group of male friends, suddenly I was scraping gunk off the barbecue grill that Terry left behind ("Why am I always wearing white?" I wondered), handwashing dirty silverware from the dishwasher, running to the grocery store, etc.

When I requested advance notice, Terry complained I was not spontaneous enough.

"Hi guys! I was just leaving," I said the next time. "Have fun!"

Then I went to movie or the library and let Terry deal with it.

@LiterateHiker Yikes! I'm terrible at spontaneous. But, I'm good at leaving room for spontaneous. For example, I love to plan out a vacation. Particularly road trips. But, some of the coolest accidental discoveries I've made have been on road trips that were planned but, had room for unplanned places along the way. I discovered Grand Canyon Caverns and a lovely little roadside diner on a road trip from Phoenix to Las Vegas because I decided to take old Route 66 through Seligman instead of Route 40 from Flagstaff to Kingman, AZ.

4

Yes you were starry eyed but then we all are in the beginning. Forgive yourself.

1

We all do stupid things sometimes without thinking, however some do stupid things all the time.

3

Little aggravations like this become huge over time. I've learned that if someone is not a net positive, walk away.

1

Is the water too cold ?

@GreenAtheist

The lake was about 40 degrees. Alpine lakes in the Cascade Mountains are freezing cold.

With the insulating of a grasshopper, I never swim in alpine lakes. I'd get hypothermia.

@LiterateHiker true a hot wet suit would not last a 5 minute dive

1

It sounds like a decent idea for camping in bear country, although it may not have been perfectly executed.

@Haemish1

"Racoons on the Rampage" was posted at the trailhead. We laughed. This was near the Pacific Ocean in Washington.

That night, Terry and I awoke to the sound of animals squealing. Peering out of the tent, we saw racoons atop our food bag, They were tearing a hole in the bag, spilling food. Racoons lined the branch and fought over food on the ground.

"Let's try to drive them away," I said. Pulling on boots, we ran down to the beach in our underwear and T-shirts, gathering baseball-size rocks.

THUNK. "Got 'em!" my mother heard Terry say. Mom was sleeping in a separate tent. "Aww, the kids are playing with the racoons." We finally gave up.

By morning, all of our food was gone. We hiked out for breakfast.

@LiterateHiker
Raccoons could/have scared the dickens out of me.
Imagine stepping out your front door, to grab the Sunday paper in a Minneapolis suburb and a giant raccoon is hissing at you from the oak tree two feet from your door!

4

Situational Awareness (SA) is what I call it.

I first learned the term when watching a show about operations on an aircraft carrier where with all the dangers, SA was key to operations (and reducing injuries). Due to the noise, a lot of communication was done by hand signals. The one I remember...The right hand is a fist held by the left hand. The right hand is then pulled out of the left hand. The meaning - get your head out of your ass and think!

It is one thing if such situations are teaching learning moments and the other person gains experience and does better. But exhausting if the same mistakes/errors are repeated over and over.

(PS - See you still have the same charm and joy now as you had then...)

Yeah I spent a year or so studying marine fireteam tactics and similar elements of situational awareness a while back when I got very competitive in a first person shooter mobile game. I was so effective at seeing what was gonna happen a minute or two in advance that I had several squads full of successful business men and workin fellas, some who had served for real, who would listen n follow the plan.

As far as I can tell it comes down to one simple element of forethought, which if you exercise it often, can be quickly followed down the road 3 or 4 steps minimum in a single deep breath before you take action. Then when you do, take action swiftly with a contingency plan or two in your back pocket.

I love strategy games that exercise forethought and a wide range of situational awareness. A lot of people have a serious problem with trigger panic though and can't calm themselves down enough to be rational when it counts. I got addicted to that game because I was addicted to overcoming that panic. I think it mostly worked. People that are somewhat accustomed to trauma and being relied on in fast paced scenarios like EMS, lifeguards, nurses etc seem to have time slow down for them in these situations and they get the job done.

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