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Can friends become lover?

Peacefulperson 6 Mar 11

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33 comments

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8

Absolutely! No one becomes my lover unless they are my friend, meaning they give a sh!t about me as a person, and I have had a number of fantastic lovers in my time. Not shaming anyone who is comfortable with different dynamics or those who prefer the opposite, that's just me.

8

Of course. In fact they say the best kind of relationship is one where you're in love with your best friend.

8

Of course they can. I'm now into a marriage that has lasted just a few days short of forever that began as a friendship. We have four adult children (that sounds weird, doesn't it?) of whom we are both proud -- and rightly so. Interestingly, in relation to this question, our relationship has grown stronger, our understanding broader, and our respect for one another increased with every year that has flown under the bridge.

7

Yes, and I think that it's the best way to do it. Once you know you can be friends, and have a basis for comunication, the rest becomes easier if you let it. The danger is in expecting your relationship to become something totally different rather than something richer once you take that step. In my opinion, the most important thing to do is communicate. My first husband and I were friends first (he died after 22 years of 'togetherness' - 17 yrs marriage) and my current husband and I started out the same. I thought he was too young for me at the time but we will be married 20 years in April. If you can laugh together, play together, talk to each other, and put up with each other - go for it!

6

My best friend of 16 years had been divorced for a few years, and well after I was divorced we met up, and began a relationship. It was so easy, comfortable, fun, our families knew and liked each other, our kids were great friends since before they started school, even our ex's got on well. Can't fault it. ok, it didn't last, but it was great.

Gets the dirty water of the chest in a safe environment. Still friends?

@FrayedBear yes and no, we split up in 2001 due to family commitments she had, but she turned up again in 2011 and we were fine, had 2 visits, but she wanted a forever commitment which given she had broken off our relationship 5 times the last time, over nothing, and I only took her back 4 times, I was not prepared to go down that road. So we had no fight, she moved house, went to Tassie actually, changed her number and I have not heard from her since. I do expect she will turn up again one day. We were an awesome team playing trivia. Her ex lives in my area and we run into each other occasionally, he and I are still good friends and I have worked with his new wife. Small world.

See pm.

4

Absolutely and lovers can become friends. Speaking from experience on both accounts.

3

Yep. The best relationships I know of are the ones where the partcipants involved never forget they started as friends

3

I married a close friend 21 years ago. Seems to have worked out.

Before you got married to your friend was it hard knowing that you friend going out on date's

@Peacefulperson I know you didn't ask me, and hope it isn't like butting in, but for me, it was only hard like it was for any friend - if I thought they mike be making a mistake - choosing a bad person or someone who would take advantage of them. The hardest thing was keeping quiet if they didn't ask for opinion or advice.

I had a crush on her before she liked me back so I didn't love the idea of her going on dates. In fact, she shot me down initially. But I dated too, while we were friends. I don't remember being depressed about it.

3

Yes of course, but the breakup really sucks..alot.

that's true

I know , what didn't help was not knowing why , although thinking about it ... that was probably the problem

@MarcIveson you didn't ask?

@Charlene No, I think we had already reached the stage of contemptuous familiarity .

@MarcIveson damn..

2

The foundation of trust and communication is rooted in friendship. Love can grow and mature into a longterm relationship. 🙂

Betty Level 7 Mar 12, 2018
2

Why not? It sounds like an ideal situation!

2

Does a USB cable plug into a USB port?

Yes. In fact, I think the best relationships start out as friendships. However, taking that step to becoming lovers can have repercussions. It might be a one night fling and you are fine. It might develop into a short relationship and then end... either acrymoniously, or not. It might continue on as just a FWB kind of thing, both of you enjoying each other physically and socially but not ready or interested in a deeper commitment... and it might deepen to that more permanent relationship.

So, the real question is what happens next? I have friends who do the FWB thing and they are fine. I have not been able to achieve this myself. Once we get naked together and enjoy each other, and explore... something subtle changes. I am sure that I am part of the problem since I have had no success here but I do think it's a two party problem.

Lol.Depends on the shape of the plug and the port. The old saying of "any port in a storm" does not apply to usb's.

Hey, I specified USB-USB interface... though, I suppose a USP port could have some fun with a Mini-USB cable... but, then we have to have a discussion about size and if it matters.

I do know for a fact that RJ-11 to RJ-45 cross breeding is possible, and fruitful, though the reverse is just painful and frustrating.

Do NOT try DVI-VGA! It is just an ugly scene no matter how much lube you try!

2

Sure they can! Are you falling in love with an platonic friend?

2

Sure, it's call f#%k buddies.

I'm too old for fuck buddies. Fuck is only for people who don't want a relationship or go on a date.

2

Yes but if it don't work out the friendship is lost most of the time as well

jorj Level 8 Mar 12, 2018
1

I would hope to be friends , then become lovers ... failing that , not a lot of point really .

1

Yes providing your husband / or wife, doesn’t mind..James

Leon Level 5 Mar 12, 2018
1

Some of my best ever relationships and definitely the most honest.

Just never call her a "fuck buddy", even in private.

0

Yes, if both people want it. If it's one sided then it makes the person who wants to keep things as friends feel awkward or guilty. Honesty is always best though.

0
0

Yes

0

Yes. However, it will change the friendship a great deal. There are soem friends I had been attracted to (and it was mutual), bu we decided not to risk changignthe friendship we already had.

In some cases it brigns on a deeeper friendship, but most of the time it introduces new enotions that inadvertantly end the friendship. I am speakign generally here. There are exceptions and no hard and fast rules, as peopel are way too diverse to say if you do this, then this will happen, but generally for most people sex changes and in the end ruins a friendship.

0
0

Lovers can become good friends. Harder to have friends become lovers.

I've always found the reverse to be true; when a relationship has started as romantic it has a different set of dynamics, at least for me, than a friendship, so when it ends, the reasons for keeping a friendship going are frequently not as strong, or there's more negative emotion involved in the "breakup" to would keep us apart - why we call it break-up, I guess. But friends tend to understand more and are more communicative through the whole process of friendship to love, and if needed, back to friendship again.

0

Yes. It happens in my life often. The trick is to look at the physical relationship as part of the entire friendship.

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