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A fun question for everyone... what is the best way to break the ice here? I’ve politely messaged some folks, and gotten next to no response. I’m hopeful I’m not terrifying. I’m aware men can be scary and pathetic and creepy by accident and on purpose. But advice? Thanks, fellow thinkers ?

SB76 5 Mar 26

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One establishes the purpose for messaging in the open forum. That is, I will rarely answer a message from anyone I don't have some prior experience with. Get out there and post. Respond to comments. Become known. Then try messaging.


Just keep chatting and see what happens


People will get to know and understand you from your posts, I rarely message, have always had polite responses.


I know it feels like a personal rejection, but don't take it personally. I sent some brief "hi" messages to folks when I saw they were nearby and...crickets. I later learned that it took them some time to spot the messages or to even realize there was a messaging feature on the site (they said as much). In the meantime, just participate in the conversations. Comment on posts. As you see interesting responses, or posts from nearby members, "follow" them on the site so you get a ping when they post something. This is all part of getting to know everyone here. As you immerse yourself in the community, people will come to you. Have fun, this is a great place to be!


I’m creepy, apparently. Just start talking, though.


Just talk. It's like throwing spaghetti against the wall, some of it will stick, some won't.


I see that as a courtesy thing. I respond to anyone who takes the time to contact me. Some folks seem to feel that if they don't like how someone sounds - or the way they look, that justifies not responding. And I suppose no response IS a response of sorts ...

Might help to have an uncovered photo though. Good luck !


Beats me. I figured I'll hang out until bored and then fade out.
Extroverts with attractive pics do best, the rest are just here for member count ?


I'm not sure who you've messaged, but, I wonder if they were here for dating, or just for community?
Perhaps including a photo of yourself, sans the shades, in future messages might be helpful?


Everyone knows people that wear sunglasses are hiding something. Are you a fugitive from the law? Do you have an odd number of eye balls?


you should interact through the posts first. i have had women tell me on here that its creepy when a guy message without knowing them at all


It puts the lotion on its skin ....has mixed responses !!

Thats funny as hell or...not?




I have guys message me all the time. I will respond to everyone. I am sorry you are not experiencing the friendship and comraderie here. I haven't spoken to anyone in my New England Region - beyond one conversation with a couple of different "local" people. All I can say is expand your boundaries. I have met one member on the other side of the country.

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